Findings:
- How Candide Was Brought Up in a Magnificent Castle and How He Was Driven Thence
- Don't kill your invisible husband to see what he looks like or you'll sob your heart out. But don't worry about the millions of invisible men coming to attack your village because they won't kill you if you don't know how to fight them.
- The girl didn't know if she was loved until he said yes.
- This wasn't how it was supposed to be
- I don't know what he was listening for, but he wasn't listening
- There was never supposed to be an Episode 7, 8, or 9
- I was pretty sure that wasn't how slasher films were supposed to end, but you won't see me complaining.
- That's Just How He Was
- The male libido - or - How I was castrated by the 90's
- How the West Was Won
- Jessica, too tall but still lovely, was not sure she would or should drop the whale
- He was a man stuck between the objective and the subjective
- He thinks a path and travels the emptiness that was there
- The braille on the door was not symbollic of my own blind search for an answer. Or maybe it was.
- If I was beautiful, I'd know it
- A half-man, half-monstertruck ex-CIA vampire must save the world the only way he knows how: with ROCK
- He wasn't programmed to be a tenor, he was programmed to be a physician!
- he was a punk poet himself
- How was your trip to London, Dan?
- How Candide Was Obliged to Leave the Fair Cunegund and the Old Woman
- Once there was a bug in a hole that he dug
- She had become a mutton for punishment and he was a wolf
- Sympathy for the Mongols & How The Rise of the West was just sheer Dumb Luck
- I'm the only person who'd ever told him to his face he was beautiful.
- Charles Bridgeman
- All he left her was alone
- I was trying to show him my insides, you know. I like to share.
- He was an ant on an ill-defined mission. She was the trapdoor spider of love.
- And I asked myself about the present: how wide it was, how deep it was, how much was mine to keep?
- (because this was always subconsciously the inspiration, even if I did not know it at the time, and I only realised it just now)
- making certain he was touching her
- I wish when I closed a book I could set it on the shelf and know it was really over
- Was it Love, or Obsession?
- Which God was cooler, the one from the Old Testament or the one from the New Testament?
- An infallible way to discern whether a decade, in pop culture terms, was win or fail
- Just how perfect was Jesus?
- He was found
- Do you remember how small your body was when you were five?
- OR WAS IT
- How my Father was excommunicated from the LDS Church
- How I was thrown from a car at 45 mph
- "He was a terrible man," she sobbed, between bites of alimony
- Five minutes after falling off the cliff, I realized how high it really was
- all I ever learned from love was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you
- How the Earth was destroyed
- He Was a Crook
- How was Trump at Munich?
- man when you are telling me how it was
- The Trial: Andrew Johnson was not guilty of the crimes for which he was impeached.
- The one thing I wanted more than anything was for someone, just once, to tell me they don't know what they'd do without me
- Shaymus is older than I thought he was
- He had fallen in love, but I'm pretty sure the hellhound was only in it for the belly rubs
- He was like the bottle of Champagne Krug
- He was born with the gift of logic but the inability to use it
- She grew a little older, while he was telling her
- When I was 21, he was building a Time Machine
- New Mexico, or was that Oklahoma?
- some say he was never here at all
- Was that real, or did I dream it?
- We did not know it was a war
- Was it Heaven? Or Hell?: Chapter VI
- Was it Heaven? Or Hell?: Chapter III
- Running a BBS
- WoOz: 17 How the Balloon Was Launched
- Was it Heaven? Or Hell?: Chapter V
- She didn't write like Emily Dickinson, but she did live in a house overlooking a cemetery, and I guess he thought that was important.
- Wheresoever he went, there was Eden
- I was supposed to be somebody by the age of 23
- RIT was supposed to be built in New Mexico
- I was supposed to be dead when this picture was taken
- Is this what I have been seeking? Or is it an echo, a remnant, a sign that I was wrong?
- Then again, maybe he was recruiting for a cult
- How was the Bible canonized?
- How Kissing Was Discovered
- More than he was willing to give
- As I looked back, he was reveling in his own feces
- How America was mapped
- How Eulenspiegel, along with the other boys, was made to eat too much bread
- Where's the kaboom?
- Tom, He was a Piper's Son
- So I was balls deep in the guy's ass that night when he turns to me and asks for a kiss. Damn. What a fag.
- How Gudrun cast herself into the Sea, but was brought ashore again
- we never really fight, so I don't know how this is supposed to go
- The cult leader poured himself a drink and started on about his plans, and I wondered how the priest was getting on
- This is the story of how I was killed in Peru
- It was late when he came home; it woke you up
- The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist
- When he was little, he laughed in his sleep.
- He was the kind of man who shacked up for shelter
- It was 1992. He smiled.
- The Abridged Edition: She was to one side, he was to the other, an untested bridge between them
- He had a prison of brass built in the hole, and then, when it was finished, he locked up his daughter
- you never once told her how beautiful she was nor how much you truly loved her
- He made me promise I would do this when I was next sad. So I promised myself I would not be sad again.
- At least he was gentle
- When he was five, his father made him murder his imaginary friend.
- How the West Was Lost
- he listened so well, he was still curious.
- The Marlboro Man died of cancer, but he wasn't a rocket scientist when he was healthy, ha ha ha.
- relatedly somehow, there was a point a few years ago when I learned how to terrify
- I didn't know such things when I was young
- middle of summer how crazy it was
- The class valedictorian was still tripping balls when he was bailed out in time to give the commencement speech at graduation
- She was coming out as he was going in.
- I'm sorry I was speeding, officer, but I really have to get to the hospital
- I didn't want to know where I was conceived
- How was the play, Missus Lincoln?
- When we was fat ( ... or, Lord Gym)
- In a quiet grove of pines under a frosty sky, he helped her out of the sack. She wore severe white hospital pajamas and was beautiful.
- when you reflect that john now knows how he's going to die.
- He was hard in all the wrong places
- Jesus said, "I love him, for he is my brother." He was talking about everyone.
- I thought he was a man but he was just a little boy
- She didn't know what outside was anymore.
- He was there, and then he wasn't, and with him went those memories
- Was it Heaven? Or Hell?: Chapter IV
- he was alive, and some of the other people, they were carbon copies
- He Was Only Joking
- I felt I was part of something, like a voice in a crowd or an island in a sea
- Every poem about thunder was written under the protection of a roof, or, at the very least, an empty sky
- Was it Heaven? Or Hell?: Chapter IX
- All the while he was talking she was thinking what his whiskers would feel like on the back of her neck
- Was It Heaven? Or Hell?
- I married him because he was not mean
- Was it Heaven? Or Hell?: Chapter VIII
- Mr. Lunch liked to chase birds. In fact, he was a professional.
- I can never be sure if it was real or just another illusion
- Finding the origin of a Hotmail message
- She was watching me and I didn’t know it.
- I didn't ask if the glass was half full or half empty. I've always had enough to drink.
- Was it Heaven? Or Hell?: Chapter VII
- He stretched out his arms but she was not there
- It doesn't matter whether Hitler was an Atheist or a Christian
- An ocean away and here he was, seeping into her
- this was supposed to be a parable about the power of the imagination
- I was less than one hundred footsteps away from you I suppose
- He was confirming to himself that they were laughing with him after all
- Foam on the tide is no more or less real than the sea, it simply is, was, will be
- Lando was supposed to die
- born under candlelight just from the edge of a knife, was it a life? or was it a light at all?
- He dreamt he was a bulldozer, she dreamt she was alone in an empty bed
- Donald Duck was banned in Finland because he doesn't wear pants
- DJuxtaposition vs. Gamestop : Or how I learned to let go of the PS2 and start loving the DC
- The Tornado, or, how we almost all got killed.
- You Forget Sometimes There Was Sunshine Back Then
- edev: Writeuptype bugs, or how nate got stuck between two parentheses
- How to determine if an egg is hard-boiled or uncooked
- How to know if you will ever experience time travel
- How to MP3 a tape, LP or the radio
- How the Old Woman Took Care Of Candide, and How He Found the Object of His Love
- How to Know God
- How to Good-Bye Depression: If You Constrict Anus 100 Times Everyday. Malarkey? or Effective Way?
- Ways to know how stupid you are really
- How many different species live on or in the average human body?
- How to share your Cable Modem or DSL connection between two computers
- How to entertain young children on little or no money
- Aristotle's Lost Library, Medieval Andalusia & Chinese Paper, or How Europe Learned to Learn Again and Why the Renaissance Happened When & Where It Did
- No matter how wise an old sheep, he can't teach a fish how to polevault
- The UK's farmers, or How to reap a profit without worrying about pesky scruples
- How does a supermodel eat a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup?
- Making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich: A teaching exercise
- I Know Not How It Falls on Me
- When a health professional is not supportive of breastfeeding
- How it feels to be interviewed (when you know the answers)
- How to recover a lost Linux root or Windows 2000 Administrator password
- How does it feel to know you are one of my bad habits?
- How to tell if you are stoned or not
- The Thanksgiving Curse, or, how we keep almost getting killed.
- I still can't think of anything, or how Fight Club changed my life
- How I got over my homophobia or the reasons that I blame my grades on a gay man
- How do we know dog biscuits are "now better tasting!"?
- Strange man makes permanent visit
- How do you pronounce a 3? Or a 0?
- How I insulted a Mormon, or reason #78345 I'm an Idiot
- she does not know how much I need this
- How did the matrix know what blue looked like?
- How to do an overbar or overline in Microsoft Word
- How Do You Know Who's A Stranger?
- I don't know how to fall in love with a woman
- The best part about you is that you don't even know how great you are
- How to herd people in public
- How to determine whether a number is even or odd in any base
- God has power, whether or not one believes in Her/Him
- How do you know when your relationship is over?
- Son, do you know how fast you were going?
- How to disable or translate caps lock in Microsoft Windows 2000
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