Findings:

• She was never mine. I always shared her.
• A Woman Who Never Was
• I was not made for love songs, and love songs will never be made for me.
• There never was a body that gave the undertaker a tip
• My father's secret life was never meant to be secret
• I can never be sure if it was real or just another illusion
• I never even went to Las Vegas, and all I got was this lousy t-shirt
• I was Dan for fifteen minutes and I never want to be Dan again
• you never once told her how beautiful she was nor how much you truly loved her
• some say he was never here at all
• I learned never to empty the well of my writing, but always to stop when there was still something there in the deep part of the well, and let it refill at night from the springs that fed it.
• Tribute to the Man Who Never Was (document)
• There was never supposed to be an Episode 7, 8, or 9
• The Epidemic That Never Was
• Despite her station, the quarry was never alone
• the little friendship that never was
• Nostalgic for a time that I never experienced and for a person I never was
• the god that can be killed was never god in the first place
• I was the man who never lied. I never lied until today.
• I was never broken
• I had never known someone whose death was imminent
• Never in the field of human conflict was so much owed by so many to so few
• I was never any good at maths at school
• A poem for two pages of panel art for a comic that was never written
• The real reason pi was never calculated to a high precision in ancient times
• The Story of the Envious Man and of Him Who Was Envied
• Music was better in the old days
• Imagine if your microwave was intelligent
• Born with the gift of laughter, and a sense that the world was mad
• Theories as to what was inside the briefcase in Pulp Fiction
• There was once a Man
• So I was cold chillin on the corner on a hot summer's day
• I'm glad the evil overlord was on my team
• The highlight of my night was two girls kissing
• Concrete, Washington
• I was expecting it to hurt like a fuck
• Cybersex before it was cool
• If the King's English was good enough for Jesus
• This wasn't how it was supposed to be
• The train station was fucking freezing and
• That Was Then, This is Now
• I wonder when I learned to smile when I was being hurt
• Jerry Was a Race Car Driver
• if music were a woman
• Before I was consciously thinking of him, my body was
• There was this one great night at Alice's house,
• Removed from humanity, I realized I was just another distraction
• A poem I wrote when I was 5
• my only pin-up was Pelé
• Able was I, ere I saw Elba
• I was discovered by scientists, what will they call me?
• Was not cleanly unmounted, check forced
• I was searching glass
• Was I nearly as anti-consumerism as I had initially thought?
• Just how perfect was Jesus?
• They wrote it all in perl but it was mostly system calls
• As I Was Going to St Ives
• Once, everyone was a computer novice
• I woke up and thought it was Saturday
• I was supposed to be somebody by the age of 23
• What was the question?
• Which of the Bewitched Dicks was gay?
• I woke up and was an instant scribbling fiend. crazy, my poor feverish brain
• If I were watched alone, I'd be considered insane
• Why Socrates was really executed
• What was left after the party
• It was more than perfect understanding
• People wouldn't fall in love so often if it were more clearly marked
• In the Beginning was the Command Line
• Jesus was Mexican
• The Princess who was Hidden Underground
• Why was Cthulhu blue?
• Here lies one whose name was writ in water
• It was not a weather balloon at Roswell
• Was (Not Was)
• Man was created in God's image
• 'T was
• I was once stranded on a dessert island
• I was a young boy that had big plans
• It was a dark and stormy night
• God was created in man's image
• Was Jesus resurrected as the Easter Bunny?
• That time I was almost killed by scary cult children
• hodgepodge was just a one-night stand, apparently
• When that cow would walk it was like she was dancing
• I Hear it was Charged Against Me
• Back when grunge was still cool
• It was all God's fault
• The Story of the Vizier Who Was Punished
• I'll tell you what kind of guy I was
• The male libido - or - How I was castrated by the 90's
• Oxygen was the world's first pollutant
• I died for Beauty -- but was scarce
• WoOz: 17 How the Balloon Was Launched
• if music was a woman you would have a mistress
• when you asked what I was writing, this is what it was
• The first iron-on transfer I made myself was controversial
• I was a homeless bum
• When I Was One-and-Twenty
• Lando was supposed to die
• There was a time when I was a better person
• I was promised flying cars
• Calvin Coolidge was the 30th President
• Last time I was in Chicago I broke my ass
• being a kid was great
• I bought an orange, but it was a grapefruit
• Conrad's dirigible was tipping
• i wonder if that was meant to console
• Leather-bound organizer
• I once was a clueless young noder
• I remember when it was me who made her toilet flush
• I remember when it was me who made her skin flush
• Is And Is Not As It Was
• That Was The Week That Was
• Willy Loman was wrong in life but he was right on the inside
• Jesus was a black man
• The last girl I dated was a vegetarian. We couldn't go anywhere and so it just didn't work out.
• Finding the origin of a Hotmail message
• I was once smaller than a jellybean, but now look at me - I am macroscopic!
• I was aghast, yet intrigued
• What would aliens think of us if Everything was all they had?
• Kilroy was here
• Descartes was wrong
• was
• Vancouver, Washington
• wa
• No shit, there I was
• Why I was convinced I would die young
• the seven hills of Rome
• The Walrus was Paul
• Climbing cherry trees when I was younger
• What I wrote when I was missing David
• This was unexpected, my soul's connection to you
• The cactus that told me my mom was asleep
• "Oskee wee wee! Oskee wa wa!"
• Trompe
• That was a joke, son.
• How Candide Was Brought Up in a Magnificent Castle and How He Was Driven Thence
• I was once a victim of Catholic schooling
• When I was your age
• It was you, Atthis
• The day I realized what being alive was
• Fast-talking career gal who thought she was one of the boys
• How Candide Was Obliged to Leave the Fair Cunegund and the Old Woman
• And the sky was made of amethysts
• Where were you when Kennedy was shot?
• The world was designed for giant squid
• It wasn't like I was sleeping anyway
• It was hormones, it was hormones, but it was valid
• You knew I was a rattlesnake when you picked me up
• It was not a dream
• If Dr. Seuss Were a Tech Writer
• I was going to marry Marty
• Marilyn Monroe was a size 16
• I was looking for you
• I was once stranded on a desert island
• No important data was harmed by the ILOVEYOU worm
• This product was tested on cute, furry animals with big, sad eyes
• Nobody cares if it was originally a nodeshell
• I was taken by a honeymoon scam
• How was your trip to London, Dan?
• Why I didn't get my driver's license until I was 18
• I was into them after they were hip
• Upon my indulgence, I was dissatisfied
• There was a rose that faded young
• So I turned round and there was an inflatable man sat at the table
• There was a young lady of Riga
• "He was a terrible man," she sobbed, between bites of alimony

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