Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "...at least once a day, retiring to the men's room so I can jerk off while I fantasize about a life that doesn't so closely resemble hell"

• How can I pour your wine while my hands shake so?
• Waiting for the tear gas in my room to fade away so i can sleep
• Weather can be pretty, yet so damaging. Sort of like some men I know
• Life is not so much about saying hello as it is about saying goodbye
• A story about a picture can only say so much, even in a thousand words or more
• Religion doesn't exist just so that people can be told what to think
• Collecting cardboard boxes, so one day, you can build a castle
• I hope they kill me while I'm standing here, so I can die happy.
• Have you ever been so excited about your life that it makes you almost want to cry?
• Do men think about sex all day long?
• This is how it appears on Wikipedia and they tend to be somewhat anal about grammar, so I'm trusting this is correct
• You know, life isn't so bad
• God can create a stone so heavy even he can't lift it
• And forty days were fulfilled for him; for so are fulfilled the days of those which are embalmed
• so the hum and silence can co-exist
• he looks a little like you... so i would rather talk about other pretty girls
• Which doesn’t sound so crazy when we put it that way
• people are lazy about explanations so they make rules
• You can only chase a shadow so far
• There's so much to think about. I'm getting distracted.
• This song is so good it can make your ears pop
• Walls so thin, I can almost hear them breathing
• Don’t take life so serious, son; it ain’t nohow permanent
• at once so warm and so insignificant.
• I tiptoe back into myself so I can run from what I was
• I am going to rewrite you so that I can still like people.
• How to be a jerk and piss off your SO
• Weather can be pretty, yet so damaging.
• she can scream so loud you'll be looking for your ears on the floor
• can it be that it was all so simple then
• How long can any one heart be so confused?
• Can God create a boulder so large He can't have anal sex with it?
• do you think i can get all my ideas out? so they aren't lost?
• I keep thinking I'm so tough but I rarely care enough to prove it. So am I really tough then? Or does every dog just have its day?
• Life Is So Good
• so many of life's truths are merely the intersections of nature
• Like sands through the hourglass, so are the days of our lives.
• So why talk about politics now
• So Where The Bloody Hell Are You?
• So while Faust is busy trying to wipe the blood off his face and Shorty's trying to claw his eyes out, I mosey away and try my hand at storming the castle
• Just so we’re all clear, it is okay to miss people you no longer want in your life
• So I'm wrestling with the demoness while the priest is trying not to soil his vestments, and Faust is just sitting there like an idiot
• Victor Hugo once got so mad he threw a baseball through a dog
• I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
• Rampant mass consumerism is so evil. Hey, can I have a sip of that Frappucino?
• So rare you can still hear it moo
• How can something so incredibly beautiful be so incredibly wrong?
• How soft your fields so green can whisper tales of gore
• It seemed so real, to me these are more than wasted days
• Dust mop so magic she can not believe how fun it is to clean up after people
• I'm so sorry my brain works that way
• I've accepted the way it is and it doesn't hurt so much
• I Am America (And So Can You!)
• Promise me disappointment so I can stop holding out for glory.
• It's so quiet, I can hear my cigarette burning.
• And if terrorists wanted to communicate secretly, mightn't they just do so by collaborating on a 'draft' here at e2? Can the NSA check on our drafts? Who knows? Inquiring minds want to know, Jay!
• retracing unknown lines in the dark so I can follow them blindly
• Please download this app so I can see you inna nude
• When will you humans learn that your "feelings" (as you so call them) can stand in the way of big cash payoffs?
• I'm not going to simplify things just so they can fit inside your mind. You don't deserve that.
• No dreamer’s diagram so symmetrical and so faultless on paper can guarantee anything. Only we can guarantee, only our behavior under pressure.
• sometimes things that look scary can be so beautiful, if you give them a chance
• try to memorize this moment so that years from now I can tell the story of it
• Not wanting to sleep so the next day won't start
• So I was cold chillin on the corner on a hot summer's day
• my heart, exploding so loudly i can hardly hear myself think
• The endless blue sky is not big enough to hold her memories, so it doesn't
• The reason we were so excited about Y2K
• please come stay with me in the forest so at least i have one person with whom i have no secrets
• I'll pretend I just cursed myself by saying this, so when it doesn't happen I have something to fall back on other than you
• Dogs don't have souls, so it doesn't matter
• I have no idea what you're talking about, so here's a picture of a bunny with a pancake on its head.
• Choosing bitterness is taking the easy way out. It's so easy to feel bitter when you've been hurt. Path of least resistence. Forgiveness is a path that goes in a very different direction.
• The problem with people who think life is inexpressibly beautiful is that they so often try to express it anyway
• Why are the most beautiful things in life so damn fragile?
• Why are the most beautiful things in life so damn robust?
• The gun is good. The penis is evil. The penis shoots seeds, and makes new life, and poisons the earth with a plague of men, as once it was. But the gun shoots death, and purifies the earth of the filth of brutals. Go forth and kill!
• On three separate occasions, I gave up my life so others could live
• Your vote doesn't matter anyway, so you might as well vote 3rd party
• I know it's boring to go on about it, it bores me to sleep, but what the hell, why doesn't it fade
• Life is so strange
• Men suck, right? Men are just plain clueless, isn't that so?
• Mull around in my mind for a while and you'll find so many treasure troves and so many graveyards that you won't be able to tell the difference between them
• You only live once, so eat an ice cream bar
• I have never felt so lucky to be able to enjoy a musician in all my life
• Some days there are so many words I need all three notebooks
• Your radical ideas about many things have already occurred to others but have never been articulated in a fashion so accessible to current generations
• My life's got rags, my life's got riches. They've all been mixed together for so long it's hard to tell them apart.
• Knowing doesn't mean so much
• Bragging about a high IQ is way worse than bragging about having a large dick. The latter can at least be demonstrably used for something and be put to good use.
• Though I may not have lived a virtuous life, at least I can say I've lived
• Dammit, I am so sick of reading about other noders enjoying human companionship
• The guy who may as well already be dead and therefore doesn't care about the consequences of his actions and is able to move with perfect freedom for the remainder of what will likely be a tragically short life
• Take these shackles off my feet so I can dance
• The city. So many lights you can actually pretend one of them's shining on you.
• Why noding about your personal life can be a bad idea
• I have to get up early and do laundry so I can wear something nice to the weirdo sex club
• Seriously, I can't speak French, so can we just skip to the love-making part?
• When we kiss I can hear your thoughts, so I would rather we didn't
• How Proust Can Change Your Life
• You Can Sleep While I Drive
• Men can download naked women. Women can't download men worshipping them. Ha ha!
• Snow Days vol. II: The Best That I Can Do
• Escape while you still can.
• At least animals can run away
• Sometimes when I hold a child I can feel my life grow long
• Life is not always fair, but you can be
• Can I hear the echo from the days of '39?
• Life must be lived forward, but it can only be appreciated sideways
• if you're going to pontificate, can I at least have a drink
• I didn't have the heart to tell him I was lying about taco night, but at least the hellhound made some friends
• Just because you should do something doesn't mean you can
• What doesn't kill you can only fuck you up for a really, really long time
• lots of small things can fill up a day without you even being aware of it
• I can photograph you while you sleep
• how life is all about loving and being loved
• even if you are in prison, you can hear it. even if you are in hell, you can hear the voice. even if you are at a distant star, you can hear the voice of the buddha.
• Real men can cook
• Things my mom doesn't argue with me about anymore
• Ivy Day In The Committee Room - 3
• Ivy Day in the Committee Room
• it's a pity we only appreciate some once they're gone, when they can no longer defend themselves
• The least I can get away with
• Can We Talk About This?
• "You want to know the only thing you can assume about a broken down old man? It's that he's a survivor."
• You can complain about athlete salaries all you want, but my voicemail is still empty.
• Don't ask me about the half life of love
• Potatoes saved my life they can save yours too
• Anonymous Men Think They Can Talk To Me
• What can a reed do but sway about and love?
• Just because I'm black doesn't mean I can rap
• The time they fantasize about was built on a lie
• once you see a can of white paint and a black cat...
• The Least We Can Do Is Wave To Each Other
• Some days are magic, and I can do anything. The other days, I just have to wait, and hope it comes back.
• It can be days before the vision passes and I see the world plainly again.
• The brief nightmare waits anxiously for dawn, tearing flesh and drinking spilled blood while it still can.
• I'm passionate about my plant life
• I can slaughter my way through Hell, but I can't kill these feelings for you
• It's a wonderful life. I can prove it.
• On a clear day you can see more than you want to
• Here's Me Inside Her But I Can Tell From Her Vagina She Doesn't Really Care
• Ivy Day In The Committee Room - 2
• A Day in the Life
• When words fail me, music helps. I can at least sing along.
• Condensed life in a can, like the ones you buy at grocery stores
• Can we still like each other knowing the worst about each other?
• About two men called Harold Budd
• It's gone, aint nothing you can do about it now
• I want to hear about his day in person
• Among the fields and small houses lies a boy I can only dream about
• life is about falling into a hole, and then climbing out of the hole
• just because i'm out on the balcony doesn't mean i'm about to jump
• If they can get you asking the wrong questions, they don't have to worry about answers.
• Just because you can do something doesn't mean you should
• I have to wonder how this can be a metaphor for my life
• Aerosol cans and a lighter can bring wet wood to life
• Populism doesn't care about people, just about The People
• How precious can human life be? There are six billion people on the planet!
• Just because you can make music doesn't mean that you should
• This terrain is constantly changing, but if you look closely, you can find the patterns
• Can you hear me Maggie Thatcher? Your boys took one hell of a beating
• No Time, No Room, No Thought, or Writing Can
• How Can You Be in Two Places at Once When You're Not Anywhere at All?
• On the last day of 2004, we will do something in Portland. That thing is called a party. You can come.
• One nuclear bomb can ruin your whole day
• Don't kill your invisible husband to see what he looks like or you'll sob your heart out. But don't worry about the millions of invisible men coming to attack your village because they won't kill you if you don't know how to fight them.
• What can you tell us about the Republican Platform?
• You can't dominate the world on $10 a day (or can you?)
• I can own this room
• The life you can save
• No one can be in two places at once
• Up, because the sky has room for us and more than we can ever make

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