The "swank" in "swankivy" does not mean I'm into porn. It's a style of music and it also means cool. Not that I particularly think I am. It's just that others have said so, and I've just had to take their word for it and accept my status. ::sigh::

I enjoy the following hobbies:

• Writing annoyingly long character-oriented fantasy novels.
• Using my soprano voice to its fullest.
• Playing ridiculous pranks.
• Playing Dance Dance Revolution until I drop.
• Working on my personal Web page, which is threatening at this moment to take over the Internet.
• Reading books that don't insult my intelligence.
• Doodling in the margins, occasionally fairly well.
• Beating other people at their own games.

I am talented in the following:

• Imitating the voices of several cartoon characters.
• Identifying grammatical errors, typos, and things in language that are just WRONG.
• Playing musical instruments; I play eight instruments with varying degrees of incompetence.
• Memorizing useless things and finding odd times to recite them.
• Surprising people with my unbalancing honesty.
• Typing. Approximately 100 wpm.

I am interested in the following:

• Japanese animation, not including hentai and tentacle porn or excessive violence.
• Mythology and religion, especially that which is Pagan in nature.
• Intellectual movies that poke fun at the idiocy of life.
• Science fiction and fantasy writings, with focus on character rather than plot. Favorite authors include Joan D. Vinge, Francesca Lia Block, Octavia E. Butler, Katherine Dunn, Vanna Bonta, Douglas Adams, Scott Cunningham, Roald Dahl, Lemony Snicket, Philip Pullman, Ivan Stang, and of course myself.
• Music. That includes ethereal type of the Enya/Loreena McKennitt camp; geeky music of the TMBG and Moxy Früvous camp; funny music of the Arrogant Worms/Weird Al camp; folk music of the Dar Williams/Ani DiFranco camp; and all kinds of music from Simon and Garfunkel ninteen-sixties to Ween, Alanis Morrissette, Björk, the Indigo Girls, Tori Amos, Suzanne Vega, and Kate Bush. (And I like musicals.)

Random facts about me:

• I am a tiny person with long blonde hair, a condition that has caused certain people to call me an elf (which has subsequently caused me to beat them into oblivion).
• I am a vegetarian.
• I live alone.
• I consider myself a Pagan, though "witch" also works in most cases.
• I've written seven novels.
• I am never bored or depressed.
• I've got a horribly filthy mouth, which unbalances people who expect me to have a clean vocabulary since I look like an innocent thirteen-year-old.
• I have worked for AOL and regularly use it. That does not mean I am stupid, so hold your tongue, vile beast.
• Sex does not interest me. That fact interests many.
• I live in Tampa, Florida.
• I am a registered member of the Church of the Subgenius.
• I've never had a driver's license.
• I was born in 1978. On a Tuesday.
• There's a lot I'm not sharing.

If you'd like to comment on something I've written on Everything, your compliments and critiques are appreciated, but please be gentle. Suggestions will do, and I will respond to them; please do not make fun of me . . . I may resort to wearing all black and threatening to kill myself if you hurt my fragile self-esteem. ::snort::

Note: I am selfish with my C!s. If you get one from me, consider it serious, not to be taken lightly. If I C! you, I REALLY appreciate your efforts. Except for that one time I C!ed someone accidentally. Oops.