A-louet-te!
Gentille alouette!
A-louet-te!
Je te plumerai!

Recognize it already, don't you? If not, bear with me, because if you've ever been one of a large group of children in the care of an adult and never sung this song, you are (I assure you) in a small, unfortunate minority. Once a French-Canadian fur-traders' canoe-paddling ditty, Alouette has for generations been a favourite of classrooms and Scout camps the non-Francophone world over. Hardly surprising, as it has all the ingredients of a campfire winner: a simple melody, pseudo-nonsensical lyrics, repetitive verses that get longer and harder as you go on, some doubled lines just begging for a call-and-response, a nice big "O-H-H-H" bit, and that all-important slippery quality of louder = better.

The non-non-Francophone reader may find my use of "pseudo-nonsensical" a little brusque. Honestly, though, my childhood memory of the song is as pure nonsense, which fact detracts from said memory not a jot. Only in my adult years did it occur to me that there is no such song as AAA-LOWETA-JONTY-PLOOMA-RETTA, and that's because I finally stumbled upon the meaning. It is this revelation that I wish to present here - Alouette, lyrics, in the original loud-friendly French, with quiet-reading-friendly English translation. (Francophones, you may go now.)

Alouette!                     Lark.
Gentille alouette!            Nice lark.
Alouette!                     Lark.
Je te plumerai!               I will pluck you.
Je te plumerai la tête        I will pluck your head.
Je te plumerai la tête        I will pluck your head.
Et la tête                    And your head
Et la tête                    And your head
Alouette                      Lark
Alouette                      Lark
               O-H-H-H... 

That's right - it's a song about ripping a pretty little bird to bits. HOW COOL IS THAT? If I'd learnt that much French when I was five, I would have been belting out Alouette for the next twenty years straight, I swear.

Anyway, the song continues into the next verse:

Alouette!                     Lark.
Gentille alouette!            Nice lark.
Alouette!                     Lark.
Je te plumerai!               I will pluck you.
Je te plumerai le bec         I will pluck your beak.
Je te plumerai le bec         I will pluck your beak.
Et le bec                     And your beak
Et le bec                     And your beak
Et la tête                    And your head
Et la tête                    And your head
Alouette                      Lark
Alouette                      Lark
               O-H-H-H...

And so it progresses, accumulating bits of lark with each verse:

Et les yeux...                And your eyes
Et le cou...                  And your neck
Et le dos...                  And your back
Et les ailes...               And your wings
Et la queue...                And your tail
Et les jambes...              And your legs
Et les pieds...               And your feet

Sources differ on the number and variety of anatomical details, presumably depending on the bloodthirstiness of the lark-plucker at hand. (There are even versions with human anatomy, complete with pointing-to-the-right-part hand movements for kiddies to learn, which give rise to such unsettling imagery as larks with oreilles - ears, and genoux - knees.) I can only say: grab a French veterinary dictionary, have fun with it. I'll leave the question of what to do when your lark is wholly free of pluckables entirely up to you.