My mind and memory have been cut into
five minute segments by
television, perfectly sized for
commercial interruptions but totally unsuited to
weaving narratives and constructing
stories.
So I sit at the side of a temple, kneeling like they kneel in the movies, with the arches of my feet pointing to the rise of the steps of the greyish Aztec pyramid, facing the camera with a contemplative look on my face. I think, and think, and think, about looking like I am thinking. I wonder about what I am supposed to be thinking about, but the mobile greenery keeps actualizing itself into my imagination.
I have a choice to make here.
To think about exploring the greenery, or the
global capitalist connotations of the word "
actualize." I choose neither.
I choose.
The choice is at my fingertips.
The world is at my fingertips.
My fingertips ache from playing guitar like Kurt Cobain, but he only plays power chords, so my fingers must ache from playing like Tom Morello.
Who is Tom Morello?
There is something that
drips off the
edge of the step I kneel on, and I decide to
contemplate it. The li
quid runs off the edge of the temple, down toward the
ground colo
red like
Quik. It does not
bubble and
fizz as it moves so it is not
Sprite. It
strangely lacks the color that I find in most other liquids. It is not br
own like
Pepsi, green like
Mountain Dew, or
pink like that disgusting cream soda my girlfri
end buys at the
Real Canadian Superstore, except in
British
Columbia where they call the
same store or
something like it Lo
blaws.
That name makes me contemplate throwing something. I remember vomiting over the side of a sharp balcony when I was a teenager, late at night after too many Smirnoff Ice and Bacardi, and its your birthday but I've already threw up all the Bacardi I was going to drink. I've used the word contemplate once too many, or twice too many things that I would like to think about.
There was a person that once knelt beside me on this temple step on an Aztec pyramid in a casino in Las Vegas beside the Star Trek exhibition that I've always wanted to see but never had the chance to make the chance to find out how I am but I never really knew what you wanted to find the things that can complete me, like a nutritious balanced breakfast of your favorite cereal killer and that is such a cliche because just because it rhymes doesn't mean that it's clever or interesting or profound like that word because its other form is profundity and I like words that follow an f with a u.