The other week, I was asked a really difficult question, and that was this one - "What's all this about women buying mountains of shoes?" Naturally, my immediate answer was, "Go ask a woman." However, this was clearly not acceptable, and as such I put myself to reflecting seriously about it.
Thus I reached an answer to this question. And here it is.
Women like shopping. (This is not a horrible sexist stereotype, it's a statement of fact. Ever heard a man talk about "retail therapy?" Now divide that by the number of times you've heard women talk about it. Well then.) And the things that women like shopping for, judging by the preponderance of retail space devoted to these items, are things to wear. However, women are also constantly worried about their weight and ballooning up, etc. etc., I blame celebrity rags myself, but that's beside the point. (Once again, not a horrible sexist stereotype, just divide the number of times you've heard a man fret about being fat by the number of times you've heard a woman do same.) This renders clothes shopping problematic. Why buy something if in three months' time it'll either swamp you or you'll not be able to fit in it? And after you've splashed out vast sums of your hard-earned cash on it? Hmmm, difficult... n'est-ce pas?
Well if only there was a bit of the female body that doesn't fluctuate in size so... like one's feet.
So by buying vast quantities of shoes, you can ensure that you are spending large amounts of cash on something that scratches your retail itch, yet you know you'll get a good service out of. See what I mean?
(Unless someone mentions ankle-swelling during pregnancy, but that's the exception that proves the rule.)
And that, audience, is my theory as to why women have unnaturally large shoe collections.
(Node 7 of 30 of my IRON NODES.)