Perhaps women are not attracted to assholes because they are assholes, but because the represent a challenge. Certainly there is nothing wrong with being treated well. It's wonderful and desirable. But, at least for me, it's upsetting to date a guy who gives in to my every whim, who never disagrees, who caves so much and so easily that though I'm not insisting he do anything I feel as though I'm walking all over him.

It's not that assholes are good and nice guys are bad. It's not that men should play hard to get. It's that it's very important, especially at the beginning of a relationship, that both parties stand up for themselves. And sometimes it's possible to be fooled into thinking that someone who is actually a raging jerk-off is merely a boy with his own life and his own desires. Some women certainly do seek out these men. But most will drop them upon seeing them for who they are and take the knowledge gained and incorporate it into the list of standards to be met by a man before they will consider dating him.

Most women, I think, have experienced being trod upon. We know how it gets old and you find yourself wondering why you set such a stupid precedent and how to get out from under it. It leads to resentment, even if the other party has done nothing to encourage it. Maybe we feel a little afraid of the role reversal, of the guilt that comes with being able to sympathize. Then again, maybe that's just me.