Everything2 Cool Archive

Helping someone who practices self-mutilation (idea)

2001-08-25T16:26:58Z

Right. I'm assuming here that the person is self-mutilating (I prefer the term self-injury, but never mind) as the symptom of a mental illness such as depression, bipolar, or borderline personality disorder (much as I don't like that diagnosis), and by 'help' you mean helping them to stop.

Short answer? It's difficult. It may be that you can't. And if you wanted a short answer, quick fix, conscience-soothing easy way out, then you really can't.

Long answer?

Short Term

If someone comes to you and they have just injured themselves, first aid will often be a necessity.
Minor cuts: the bleeding should be stopped by applying pressure, and elevating the limb if necessary. The cut should always be cleaned out and antisepticed; infection is often a problem for self-injurers. Dress the cut if necessary.
If the cut is gaping, deep (seeing the subcutaneous fat layer is a Very Bad Thing) or has not stopped bleeding within 30 minutes, the

…

xmonad (thing)

2009-11-29T06:58:45Z

No writeup on xmonad? What the hell is the matter with you people?

Xmonad is the totally bitching, kick-ass tiling window manager written in Haskell for use with the X11 windowing environment. It is incredibly configurable and allows you to do things like:

Arrange your windows in a Fibonacci spiral
Press mod-P to run dmenu, which lets you run any program with visual autocomplete.
Run xmobar, which you could really do anyway, but if you use the avoidstruts layout, it works very nicely, and xmobar/dzen/whatever will take the output from xmonad's loghook and jam it right into your totally bitching menubar!
Write extensions in Haskell!
Do whatever the hell you want, because Haskell is the best programming language in the history of programming languages!

Did I not sell you on using xmonad yet? Well, here's my xmonad.hs, for your perusal. It has a bunch of…

What if I had never met you? How much the poorer would my life have been. (person)

2007-01-22T12:13:08Z

Because I promised –- Kaj

I first learned of you on April 4, 2005. Anne -– my wife, your Mommy -– had gone to the doctor for blood tests, because the doctor was worried about Mommy's health. Mommy was a very frail woman before you were born. On our second honeymoon, at Rehoboth Beach -– maybe three years before you came into our lives -- she took a spill on a motor scooter, ripping the lining of two of her lower vertebrae. Those are the bones down at the bottom of her back.

Well, that hurt Mommy a lot, and she couldn't move very well for months after that. Daddy had just been made partner at his work, and so he could decide for himself when to go to work and when to stay at home. So, he took six weeks off from work -- that's a long time -- trying to nurse Mommy back to health. Her back hurt so much Daddy couldn't even sleep in the same bed with her. He slept on the floor next to the bed.

To help…

An unfinished kiss leaves a taste that is hard to get rid of (fiction)

2009-11-29T03:47:41Z

Una mirada
Ojos que matan
De rodillas en tentacion

I was shrooming when I met her. Shrooming really hard. With crazy thoughts racing through my mind, it was hard to focus on anything. I was in her head though - analyzing and understanding her every thought, every glance, every carefully chosen word. Pondering her intentions, sifting through the layers of verbal bullshit to understand who she wanted me to see. Her eyes grazed my face, pausing momentarily on my own. I knew what she was going to say before she said it: "Can I play with your eyelashes?"

Warm smile – long blond hair
Pretty green eyes and skin damned fair
For sure lucky to get with a girl like that
Couldn't pass this chance no matter what...

She's drunk on a Monday night, and I'm trying to score.
"I don't give a fuck…

I no longer look askance at the outlier cats, (essay)

2009-11-06T00:19:00Z

You understand that they are fluffy.
That's their role and their raison d'etre. Why we accept
those superfluous consonants and the excess fur.

But tonight, before it was dark, I watched
Coal. And Fuzz and Two-Socks. While 50-50
watched me. The orange interloper had such
an air of patience.

A few extra bites
None are underfed.
There are flea collars.

Project Steve (idea)

2009-11-28T02:28:52Z

Evolution is a vital, well-supported, unifying principle of the biological sciences, and the scientific evidence is overwhelmingly in favor of the idea that all living things share a common ancestry. Although there are legitimate debates about the patterns and processes of evolution, there is no serious scientific doubt that evolution occurred or that natural selection is a major mechanism in its occurrence. It is scientifically inappropriate and pedagogically irresponsible for creationist pseudoscience, including but not limited to "intelligent design," to be introduced into the science curricula of our nation's public schools.
Project Steve's official statement

Project Steve is a tongue-in-cheek response to creationist claims that evolution is a "theory in crisis". Directly, it riffs on the…

Batwoman (person)

2009-11-28T19:07:27Z

She began life as one of the few superheroes to appear after the Golden Age of Comix but before the Silver Age got underway. She came about because of the reactionary politics and homophobia of the 1950s—- but when they remade her for the twenty-first century, she became the most prominent lesbian in mainstream comics, actually inheriting DC Comic's namesake title.¹

"That not Batgirl..." thinks hardboiled detective Renee Montoya, when the character makes her second debut. "That's a Batwoman! Hot damn!"

In 1954, Dr. Fredric Wertham published Seduction of the Innocent, a sensationalistic attack on comic books which made headlines and turned the conservative psychiatrist into the toast of the PTA circuit. Among his many charges: comic books encouraged homosexuality and sadomasochism.

Batman and Robin, in particular, were "a wish dream of two homosexuals living together."…

hedge (thing)

2009-11-28T21:59:09Z

Introduction

One of the words you will hear most on a trading floor is the word hedge. A hedge, quite simply, is some way to reduce or remove the unwanted risk of a position, like hedging a bet. A proverb among trades is that "The only perfect hedge is in a Japanese garden". Although I cannot comment on Japanese horticulture, I can comment on the quality of some hedges, so that is what I will do. I will then explain why a hedge is very important in finance.

Basis risk

If you have a position in one asset, and do a trade in the same asset that perfectly compensates this position, one could say one has a perfect hedge. However, this is commonly just known as having no position. As such, having a hedge position almost by definition implies that the hedge is not perfect; a perfect hedge is not called a hedge, but a flat position. However, when a hedge is not perfect, we introduce basis risk. …

Batwoman (person)

2009-11-28T19:07:27Z

"That not Batgirl..." thinks hardboiled detective Renee Montoya, when the character makes her second debut. "That's a Batwoman! Hot damn!"

Batman and Robin, in particular, were "a wish dream of two homosexuals living together."…

him will I blot out of my book (event)

2009-11-28T18:46:34Z

It has been so long, the broken color electronic has begun to fade. Cold metal ktan ktan ktan of linkers running, heads down, hastily scribbling and tossing links to the wind, into the unflinching devouring jaws of the readers above, black toothy skulls with indeterminate eyes, birdlike, hunting and snapping. Back away, Octavius gives smirk at them, pulls softleather sleeve to watch: 2352. 8 min will be fine, he decides, they will get past the reset. A few turn off down a sidelink, weaving through nodeshells and into a sprawling factual, ducking behind the references; the others directly inbound. It is a cold night to be noding. In his mind, Octavius hears his mentor laugh: "Dead Links! Linking isn't really all about putting in some square brackets to keep the CEs off you back: it's about sharing good ideas and guiding the readers along some paths that you, the noder, have thought out on…

Batwoman (person)

2009-11-28T19:07:27Z

"That not Batgirl..." thinks hardboiled detective Renee Montoya, when the character makes her second debut. "That's a Batwoman! Hot damn!"

Batman and Robin, in particular, were "a wish dream of two homosexuals living together."…

Emily. Emily. Emily. Delete. (poetry)

2009-11-26T16:04:04Z

Emily.
Dearest Emily
why so long without words?
why is your only answer silence?

Emily.
Dearest Emily,
I am sure I could explain why
there was dress on the floor, in the foyer, when you walked in,
last week

Emily.
when I saw you dancing at the club
last night, by yourself, with your eyes closed
I was struck by how alone you are

Emily. Emily. Emily.

Delete

Cory Doctorow (person)

2009-11-27T12:24:25Z

Cory Doctorow is a Canadian science fiction author and Internet celebrity who currently resides in London. Doctorow has gained fame in the online world by working with groups such as the Electronic Frontier Foundation and the UK Open Rights Group and by releasing his literary works simultaneously free-of-charge online and in low-cost print form.

Doctorow's novels, short stories, and essays have been nominated for several prestigious awards, such as the Hugo and Nebula Awards, and have won the Prometheus Award and the Indienet Award. Besides making it easy for people to access his books free of charge, Doctorow contends that releasing his works online has actually increased print sales of his books, proving that a pairing free, online releases and print runs can be economically viable.

At the time of writing, Doctorow's latest book is Makers (October 2009), which deals with the issues of innovation during times of economic collapse. His next two…

Dear whoever (poetry)

2009-11-28T05:10:32Z

This winter's afternoon, I sit
here in my third-floor, lacquer-washed
little glass box.

The boss is away, and there is
just enough work, if I forget
the filing, to fill
half
the time until five.

(I find, somehow, that I can
always forget the filing.)

And so, I write.

When I'm done, I will take
these shaped-and-crafted,
thoughtful words,
and print them blackly
on white A4. I'll fold the page -
five simple folds to form
a paper plane, and send it
spinning from the window
to soar or plummet.

I hope when you find this, stranger,
smoothing it out to read
my message, that it will make you smile.

Perhaps you'll look up
into the inscrutable eyes of the
blind office buildings, seeking
a flash of sight
and understanding.

But even if you…

Every Tuesday, I dress as a 46-year old woman and waitress at a diner on route 27. This is the meaning of life. (poetry)

2006-09-16T17:17:43Z

Service

He comes on wet Tuesdays to the diner
in the fall. Weary-eayed, hungry and drenched
by September rains, he always orders
the same thing. "Biscuits and gravy, ma'am. Please."
Polite to a fault and so damn handsome
my hands shake when I pour him his coffee.

I serve it black and piping hot. Coffee
warms his hands and belly; In this diner
hospitality's the rule. A handsome
plate of grits and buttermilk biscuits drenched
in sausage gravy steams. It wants to please
him; we all do. Whatever he orders

on damp lonely nights I'll serve. He orders
only biscuits, gravy and hot coffee,
nothing off the menu. I'd like to please
him wriggling on the hard tiled diner
floor till we cry out as one. Hot and drenched
with butter from my biscuit. The handsome

boys used to follow me home. The handsome
boys are all long gone. Now, I take orders.
I'm…

Thanks. It's a pleasure to serve you. (personal)

2009-11-26T22:09:28Z

It was six months after my twentieth birthday, and several weeks after I had gotten my first real job that I learned the True Meaning of Thanksgiving. Before, like most youths raised in the culture of cynicism, I had heard "we have so much to be thankful" for that the bland benedictions were stopped by my filter before their meaning registered. But, at 20, I had a job doing tech support and I learned the meaning of thankfulness: it was the feeling when the first 15 minute break came, which let me know I was half way to lunch hour. And lunch hour was halfway through the day. And there was one more day down. Life was easy with that short focal length. Because I was a working man, now, I couldn't visit my family that Thanksgiving, but I went to my friends' house, and had a nice tofurkey with their somewhat-traditional Catholic family.

I am sure everyone has a story like that, where they learned that there was a truth behind the cliches of gratitude. A time when youthful…

Project Steve (idea)

2009-11-28T02:28:52Z

Evolution is a vital, well-supported, unifying principle of the biological sciences, and the scientific evidence is overwhelmingly in favor of the idea that all living things share a common ancestry. Although there are legitimate debates about the patterns and processes of evolution, there is no serious scientific doubt that evolution occurred or that natural selection is a major mechanism in its occurrence. It is scientifically inappropriate and pedagogically irresponsible for creationist pseudoscience, including but not limited to "intelligent design," to be introduced into the science curricula of our nation's public schools.
Project Steve's official statement

Project Steve is a tongue-in-cheek response to creationist claims that evolution is a "theory in crisis". Directly, it riffs on the…

A Brief History of Bottoms (idea)

2003-02-26T14:30:13Z

When did you last really think about your bottom? Too many of us sadly take them for granted, but it could be argued that the bottom is the most important part of your body. Every day we sit down on it, waggle it around as we walk, stick things up it for pleasure, crane round to admire it in the mirror, and poo out of it. Can such a thing that gives us so much pleasure ever be praised too much? Yet how much of the fascinating, chequered history of the human bottom do you know? Time to put that right!

Ancient bottoms

Because bottoms don't fossilize we can't be sure when they evolved. Could Homo erectus and the later Homo antecessor sit down for a rest on a comfy mossy rock, or were they obliged to lie down a prey to every passing scavenger; or did they perhaps just walk around unceasingly, without hope of rest, like a basking shark? The arrangement of the pelvis in Neanderthals suggests they were carrying a bit of weight around the old backside, but they were…

Iron Bitch at the Dance (idea)

2009-11-26T15:19:17Z

Iron Bitch is at the dance. The Spanish Ballroom, from the 1930s, in Cabin John, Maryland. Live band, 400 insane swing dancers and no alcohol.

It is summer. Guys bring three t-shirts. It's nice to change one when the sweat is flung off during twirls. Iron Bitch loves to dance. It's the one time she is ok with following. A novel experience, following. Even following there is room to improvise. Not this twirl, that one. A double instead of a single. Sometimes no twirl, even though one was led.

She is wearing the basic black gored skirt. Good twirling material. She has the opaque black thigh highs on, with the spray of black feathers spread on each upper outer thigh, like a hand print. Black velvet tank top which would steam if the air weren't already saturated.

Iron Bitch's next dance is with Big Boy. She spots him. As they move through the flow…

Writing an academic paper which presents an argument (how-to)

2009-11-06T08:20:18Z

Key parts of an argument paper

If you are writing an academic paper to present or develop an argument, it must have certain key elements:

A debatable thesis

This is a single, clear statement, usually expressed in a single sentence and placed at the end of your first, introductory paragraph, which answers the question presented or implied by the assignment task and presents your position on the topic. For instance if the essay title you were discussing was "Fast food is not harmful" the implied question is "Is fast food harmful?" and your thesis statement needs to answer this implied question with a clear position statement (which must allow a possibility of disagreement between reasonable people) This is sometimes called the claim.

Example of a non-debatable thesis statement: Excessive takeaway food is always harmful
This thesis statement is not…

Cripple Mr Onion (thing)

2009-11-28T05:39:37Z

Cripple Mr. Onion is a fictional card game mentioned in several of Terry Pratchett's Discworld novels. Although it gets mention in a number of them, it's only actually played for the reader aboard a riverboat in Witches Abroad. During a journey undertaken by the witches Magrat Garlick, Nanny Ogg, and Granny Weatherwax (forming the standard maiden, mother, and crone trio), Nanny loses their traveling money to a gang of hustlers playing Cripple Mr. Onion. Granny Weatherwax decides to hustle the hustlers and win their money back, in her own unique manner. It's during this sequence that we get our best, indeed our only, look at the game.

Resolving not to use magic (Cheatin's all right. That's practic'ly fair. I mean, anyone can cheat. But using magic — well, it's tempting Fate), Granny uses the principles she calls "headology" to distract, annoy, and agitate the card sharps to prevent them…

Driving on the Interstate Highway System with a gunshot wound (how-to)

2009-11-28T02:35:13Z

This is an instructional type writeup that contains vital instructions and information on...

How to drive on the Interstate Highway System with a gunshot wound

One of the things that happens when you are living a correct life and getting out there and mixing it up with the kind of trash that belong in an eight by ten cell is that you get shot. As someone who has been to Cairo as I have and is talking to someone like you who has never been to Cairo and never will, I am the best person to instruct you in these matters.

The first thing you need to do after suffering a gunshot wound is to get on the Interstate Highway. This is because the police can get a look into your car on city streets and also on county roads and other numbered streets that go from here to there, but on the Interstate Highway you can move fast and even if highway patrol cars drive alongside you everything is so blurry that they don't know whether you are a man behind the wheel or a dog.…

Street Moses ( nothingventured ) (idea)

2004-01-10T23:56:31Z

Climb up upon that rock
among the muddy waters,
apart a part of
the blue dream rushing
and thick tree hisses.

Little doll's hand,
porcelain forced in
fisted fingers thrust
from rubble, from scrap heap,
stabs toward the stars.

Tear from a sleep
with ghosts and ashes.
Kick that coffin door
open to scream, "I'm
…

People wouldn't fall in love so often if it were more clearly marked (poetry)

2009-11-24T14:07:22Z

Where is the line between love and in love
Where does it start
And where does it end?
When do I add that tiny word in
When can I change from I love
To I am in love
With you?

Hypothetical, please
Don't tear up on me
I'm just asking
When do I know
To change the words
What is the difference
Between what we have now
And what they sing to the clouds?

And how can I pinpoint
The very exact moment
That I slip from love
Into love
With you?
And more importantly
Do I want to?

The Ten Most Ridiculous Metal Videos Ever (review)

2009-11-27T23:47:43Z

Oh fuck a pig with Thor's hammer, I'm spoilt for choice on this one.

Yano how I wrote about the ten geekiest metal songs ever, and how if you're a metal band you can get a field full of overweight, oversexed, overbearing drunkards thrashing about to songs based on Warhammer 40k or Galactus or even arsing Nintendo games? Well, for the same reason you can do this, music videos like the following are made. Enjoy. They are all silly beyond belief and all totally rule.

10. Blind Guardian, "This World Is Sacred"

In one two-word sentence: ORCS MOSHING. Specifically, computer generated orcs moshing in a computer generated hall while a computer-generated version of the band performs on stage, like it's a cut scene from a video game. Which it is. Because this song, and the video to it, were released as part of the game "Sacred 2 - Fallen Angel." And they weren't just bundled with it - they were integra…