What to do if you've got too many votes on your hands

Happy 4th birthday to me

3 years of updates, 3 years of joy, 3 years of being a goy soy toy boy

Last year's news:

OMG!! OMG!!! What to do if you've got too many votes on your hands celebrates its two year anniversary!

Last year's last year's news:

What to do if you've got too many votes on your hands celebrates its one year anniversary!

Teh original node:

You know how it is.... You come home after a long day. You're REALLY tired. But you haven't been on Everything2 all day. You HAVE to log on. And then you see the usual screen:

Ack! You lost experience

Dammit! You are SO tired...

Must... go... to... sleep... must... get... XP... sleep... XP... Sleep... XP...
45 votes? You'll never make it! And vote dumping on daylogs is so passé! Footprints to the rescue!. I bring you:

Footprints' 2 step guide to easy vote dumping

Step 1

Step 2

The List

1. I added my comments to some of these nodes. I am not presuming to tell you which way to vote on these nodes. I may, however, state my opinion. For the record, I believe that any GTKY (Getting To Know You) Node, deserves to die. This is in the spirit of E2. There are homenodes and daylogs for things like "How many people have you had sex with?"
2. I will be updating this. Thank you, come again.
3. I have tried to pick exceptionally votable nodes. I may have contributed to some of them, and not necessarily in any way I am proud of. I still chose to put them here, because I deserve downvotes for GTKY nodes like everyone.
4. Footprints is in no way responsible, nor will he be liable for, the opinions in the following nodes, or their existence. If you do find a faulty link, please /msg me.

• Tell me a story about trains ~30 - let me bore you to death with 30 stories about trains
• Favorite Everything Quotes ~23 - Hilarious
• why strapping buttered toast to a cat's back will not produce infinite power ~18
• sex ~18 - yes, that's right, I need 18 people telling me what sex is. I thought it was just another word for gender
• Why don't men shave? ~16
• Why do men like women's breasts? ~16 - 16 experts answer that tough question
• The Theory of Evolution is not a valid theory ~15
• Guns don't kill people. Wait, guns do kill people. ~15
• Tell me about your secret places ~15 - you mean the places that USED to be secret before you you wrote about them on the internet.
• masturbation ~13
• Virginity, my loss of ~13 - GTKY
• Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle ~12 - Most of the w/u's here are worth your read. At last, a totally factual vote-dumping node!
• You know you're a geek when... ~11 - GTKY
• What do girls think about guys when they catch guys staring at their breasts, but the guy is actually trying to read her shirt? ~10
• SOY! SOY! SOY! soy makes you strong! strength crushes enemies! SOY! ~10
• Why men like lesbians ~10
• Pascal's wager ~10

New Additions

• Fight Club ~21 - a node about a movie. Yes, ONE movie.
• Tech Support ~15

Newer Additions

• Should you have to understand lyrics to enjoy the music? ~ 14
• haiku ~ 25
• Random strangers you remember ~17 GTKY
• Stupidest thing you've coded just to see if you could~18 Is this a GTKY node?

Newest Additions

• Quotes from sleeping people ~34 GTKY
• America is not a country ~20
• Battlefield Earth ~14 AlexZander says: "14 people had commentary on the worst movie of the century." (I haven't seen it). Thanks Alex! Keep on updating me, people!

Can they get newer than this?

• I remember ~23 Thanks Ereneta!
• American Beauty ~14 In the immortal words of Ereneta (thanks again), "How many writeups does it take to review American Beauty?"
• People who don't capitalize their I's ~17 This is like a GTKY node!

I guess they can!

• How does an atheist swear a vow? ~16
• Everyone has a dead bird story ~23 Thanks Ereneta!
• I love you ~21
• how to get rid of a tailgater ~17
• Things That Rhyme With Orange ~12 quite impressive, considering the number of w/u's there should be 0, as nothing rhymes with orange. incidentally, i don't see a Things That Rhyme With Purple node. Oh wait, there is. Okay, so i don't see a Things That Rhyme With Silver node.

My oh my! It doesn't end!

• Suicide ~24
• Deciding whether or not to take your fiance's last name is a tough decision. ~13
• April Trolls Day ~17 From here, you can move on to April Trolls Day II, III etc. (I only got as far as II, but cordelia tells me there's at least 3). Judging by the reps on the w/u's though, almost everyone's already upvoted them.
• Are all Geek Chicks bisexual tom-boys? ~11

There's more round the bend!

• nice guys finish last ~14 Thanks cordelia! (and yes, when you referred it to me, it was still 16, but some editors are quicker than others).
• all men are rapists ~13 A classic multi-w/u node
• Hello world ~20

That rhymed! I'm a poet!

• death penalty ~19 Thanks vladkornea!
• Happy Birthday ailie ~12 Sing in the style of James Brown: "Downvote, heh! You gotta downvote! Heya! Can we throw this node off a bridge? I said, can we throw this node off a bridge? HEH!"
• Occam's Razor ~12]
• Serial Experiments Lain ~17
• Untitled ~10
• Some Jews actually get pissed when you wish them a Merry Christmas ~21 And this year's update award goes to.... ta tum! cordelia!
• Feature Request for Universe 2.0 ~18 GTKY - and nose to nose with cordelia - Professor Pi! You two are great!

I didn't even know it!

• Strange things homeless people (urban outdoorsmen) have said to me. ~11 you guessed it, cordelia again! GTKY
• US-Centricity on Everything ~18 thanks bigmouth strikes
• abortion ~15 cordelia!!!

More newer additions

• The Matrix ~17 bd
• Memorable lines from computer games bd says: Oh my!
• 10 Reasons to Believe in God ~10 bd
• Technology that gets lost between now and Star Trek ~13 Hooray! After almost a month of no updates!

More more newer additions

• insomnia ~13 Ereneta
• Coffee ~10 cordelia
• SOS ~11 Again, Ereneta
• mozilla ~10 And again, Ereneta.
• Is Everything artificially intelligent? ~10
• pulp fiction ~11 Ereneta to the rescue!
• Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon ~16 Who else but Ereneta!!!

More newer more additions

• democracy ~11 Ms. Ereneta
• I Am ~10
• change ~10 Ereneta
• God ~11 Ereneta says: "oh"
• Who Wants to be a Millionaire? ~11 Ereneta
• Shiva ~10
• cracker ~10 Ereneta!
• iMac ~10 Ereneta!
• oasis ~10 Ereneta~

Dated additions (newest)

• it ~11 Ereneta! Would you believe it! (29/1/2002)
• spoon ~12 (30/1/2002)
• fork ~11 All cutlery nodes c/o Ereneta! (30/1/2002) node ~12 a node (4/2/2002)
• how to answer a telephone ~15 Ereneta! (7/2/2002)
• Bob ~15 (12/2/2002)
• writer's block ~11 As you can see, no such problem here (13/02/2002)

Valentines' Day Special

• Everything High School ~30!!! I am so excited. Thanks, Ereneta, for finding me this on this glorious St. Valentine's day. I have been a bit depressed, as the editors and Gods have really been removing GTKY nodes, so I haven't been able to dump downvotes very efficiently. But on this lovely day, both you AND your lover can share the joy of downvoting 30!!! writeups! (14/2/2002)

Post-Valentine's day updates

• 666 ~12 I could have written some devilishly good comment, but I didn't (15/2/2002)
• trinity ~15 Ereneta! (26/2/2002)
• a ~16 (26/2/2002)
• c ~11 no, b has only 7 (26/2/2002)
• d ~11 (26/2/2002)
• e ~16 the vowels are doing well (26/2/2002)
• g ~14 no, f has 6 (26/2/2002)
• i ~13 no, h has 6 (26/2/2002)
• k ~12 no, j has 7 (26/2/2002)
• m ~11 no, l has 3. Interestingly enough, M has no Webbie defn. (26/2/2002)
• x ~18 what about nopqrstuvw? no (26/2/2002)
• z ~13 no, y do you ask? (26/2/2002)
• our sensei ~26 /me misses sensei (27/2/2002)
• depression ~13 Ereneta! (3/3/2002)

More dated updated updates with dates up-of-thereof with a forthwith and a hey-ho

• Freedom ~18 Thanks Mr. TBBK! (10/3/2002)
• commercials with carefully edited songs ~10 (13/3/2002)
• The E2 Musical Project ~14 Ereneta! (16/3/2002)
• poetry ~16 Ereneta! (19/3/2002)
• first kiss ~21 Another exciting GTKY node (19/3/2002)
• python ~15 Ereneta! (22/3/2002)

Gather round countrymen, please heed my call

• Revenge of Nature Trail to Hell (in 3-D): A Very Appalachian E2 Gathering... OF DOOM! ~13 Ereneta! (22/3/2002)
• HOT DAMN! An E2 gathering in Ohio?!?!! ~19 Ereneta says: "And sweet mother of God-- an event so big it needed two nodes" and ditto for the next link (22/3/2002)
• HOT DAMN!: Drinking, Debauchery, and Dastardly Deeds ~15 (22/2/2002)
• The Whiz-Bang Atlanta E2 Party ~16 Ereneta says: "Read about another party you didn't go to" (22/3/2002)
• Grouper and oysters and shrimp, oh my! An E2 New Year's gathering on Florida's Gulf Coast ~12 Ereneta (22/3/2002)
• the source code of my brain ~14 GtKy. Ta Ereneta (2/4/2002)
• omniscience and free will are contradictory ~12 (4/4/2002)

Welcoming TBBK to the list of contributors!

• Reasons why vinyl is better than CDs ~10 Thanks TBBK! (9/4/2002)

• Mercury ~13 TBBK (9/4/2002)
• Venus ~12 TBBK (9/4/2002)
• Earth ~12 TBBK (9/4/2002)
• Mars ~13 TBBK (9/4/2002)
• Jupiter ~12 TBBK (9/4/2002)
• Pluto ~12 TBBK (9/4/2002)

• Satan ~12 TBBK (9/4/2002)
• Gun Control ~13 TBBK (9/4/2002)
• War on Drugs ~16 TBBK (9/4/2002)
• Ayn Rand ~12 TBBK (9/4/2002)
• Star Wars ~13 TBBK (9/4/2002)

Okay, after a year and I half of incessant updating, you can undertsnad how I migth botch up the spelningl a litlet ibt on theses heders

• Pac-Man ~11 Ereneta! (10/4/2002)
• Salvador Dali ~12 (13/4/2002)
• "A Story", by Everythingians ~32 booya! (16/4/2002)
• Google ~11 (24/4/2002)
• starbucks ~15 (29/4/2002)
• Female bathroom etiquette ~10 There's so much witty stuff I could have said here, but I chose this sentence. (6/5/2002)
• Humans have six senses, why does everyone think we only have five? This node has 14 writeups. Why does everyone think I liked 'Sleepless in Seattle'? ~14 (8/5/2002)
• Christians don't believe that "being good" gets anyone into Heaven ~10 (8/5/2002)
• Brave New World ~12 (9/5/2002)
• Happiness ~16 (15/5/2002)
• earliest childhood memory ~11 A GTKYN, I believe. Thanks, Ereneta (15/5/2002)
• Kiss The Constitution Goodbye ~10 Thanks Miles Dirac (28/5/2002)
• truth ~17 Miles_Dirac says truth has 17 write-ups; I do not lie (29/5/2002)
• The Real Mother Goose has about 300, but they're not so accessible, as you have to do a lot of clicking. Your call. Thanks cahla (30/5/2002)
• Ask moJoe : Advice for the Criminally Confused ~26 Noung updates, and adds "plus the links to the answers in the first one." (1/6/2002)
• The End ~13 TheBooBooKitty says: 'mostly cut and pastoids!' (4/6/2002)

And you thought I ran out of ideas for headers!

• freestyle ~12 Ereneta! (7/6/2002)
• cutting your own hair ~14 Thanks Miles Dirac(18/6/2002)
• Alice ~13 RimRod! (25/6/2002)
• Life ~11 (25/6/2002)
• gnutella ~12 RimRod is becoming quite the contributer. Or as Elmer Fudd would say: "nutewa ~12 WimWod is becoming quite the contrwbutew, eheheheheh (28/6/2002)
• quine ~11 (29/6/2002)
• IQ ~11 Let's give a warm hand to LaggedyAnne! (4/7/2002)
• live ~11 LaggedyAnne]! (4/7/2002)
• Fibonacci number ~19 LaggedyAnne! and JohnnyGoodyear! for updating (4/7/2002)
• Speed limits should be higher for motorcycles ~10 Ereneta! (6/7/2002)
• California ~16 Ereneta! (6/7/2002)
• Migraine ~11 RimRod! (6/7/2002)

The colors of the rainbow, so pretty in the sky.

• blue ~12 RimRod! (7/7/2002)
• green ~15 (7/7/2002)
• black ~11 (7/7/2002)
• orange ~13 Orange you glad I didn't say purple? (7/7/2002)

RimRod goes east

• Zen ~12 Can you guess it? (8/7/2002)
• Enlightenment ~12 Yup (8/7/2002)
• Mu ~13 What does a buddhist cow say? (8/7/2002)
• wasabi ~11 Again, thanks to our eastern correspondent (9/7/2002)

RimRod goes south

• tattoo ~10 RR (12/7/2002)
• circumcision ~10 RR (12/7/2002)
• male genital mutilation ~12 RR (12/7/2002)

RimRod goes veggie

• PETA ~12 Until further noticwe, updates courtesy RR (13/7/2002)
• Militant vegans ~10 (13/7/2002)
• half-assed vegetarian ~10 (13/7/2002)

RimRod reveals all

• Mixed drinks you come up with when you're drunk ~10 (13/7/2002)
• I am a sexist ~13 (13/7/2002)
• Dark Matter ~11 (14/7/2002)
• hope ~11 (14/7/2002)
• Apparently I am a potential rapist ~12 (15/7/2002)

RimRod starts throwing random stuff in my direction, forcing my to have no suitable title

• ACME ~10 (19/7/2002)
• Generation X ~12 (19/7/2002)
• Thinking without language ~11 (19/7/2002)
• Aurora Borealis ~11 (19/7/2002)
• How to get past the alarm gates in retail stores ~14 (19/7/2002)
• school shootings ~13 (24/7/2002)
• where feminism lost me ~14 (24/7/2002)
• drive ~10 (24/7/2002)

New header

• face ~10 Thanks Frankie! (24/7/2002)
• What the hell is Grimace, anyway? ~10 (26/7/2002)
• what do you hear in the silence? ~14 RimRod (31/7/2002)
• skin ~10 RR (7/8/2002)
• Neon Genesis Evangelion ~10 RR (7/8/2002)
• Fear of genetically altered food unfounded ~10 RR (7/8/2002)
• head ~12 RR (11/8/2002)
• buddy ~10 RR (11/8/2002)
• windows xp ~15 RR (11/8/2002)
• contact ~11 RR (11/8/2002)
• speed of light ~12 Frankie sez: "it takes 12 people to tell us we can't go that fast?" (11/8/2002)
• Choke ~12 RR (11/8/2002)
• money ~10 RR (17/8/2002)
• Decrying political correctness without an understanding of its causes and intended consequences is little more than racism muttered under one's breath ~10 RR (17/8/2002)
• Minority Report ~11 caknuck (17/8/2002)
• science ~14 RR (17/8/2002)

Newer Header

• creep ~14 RR (19/8/2002)
• So charmingly heathen, your skin is like a teardrop on a popsicle ~12 RR (19/8/2002)
• What you do when you can't sleep in the night ~11 RR (19/8/2002)
• shotgun ~10 RR (19/8/2002)
• XOR ~15 RR (19/8/2002)

RimRod is doing a wonderful job of updating me and thus helps keep everyone with plenty of votable nodes, for which we are all grateful. On a side note, getting so many updates in the past day sort of clogged up my inbox. I don't mind at all. Anyway, to show RimRod our appreciation, please copy and paste the following into the chatterbox and press 'talk': /msg RimRod great job in updating Footprints on What to do...! I realise I am one of many thanking you and so your inbox must be awefully crowded, but I had to show my appreciation.

• 420 ~12 RR (19/8/2002)
• The Russian sub stuck at the bottom of the Barents Sea ~12 RR (19/8/2002)
• morse code ~10 RR (19/8/2002)
• go ~10 RR (19/8/2002)
• How to make a decent cup of tea ~15 RR (19/8/2002)
• hyperion ~11 RR (19/8/2002)
• RimRod says Nimrod (not RimRod!) ~10 (19/8/2002)
• suicide is NOT a solution ~10 RR (19/8/2002)
• lullaby ~11 RR (19/8/2002)
• Butterfly~15 RR (19/8/2002)
• MRI~10 RR (19/8/2002)
• Yossarian's School of Badassary ~10 RR (21/8/2002)

Rent this header

• Grilled cheese sandwich ~11 at last, a food node on this veritable list (21/8/2002)
• sin ~14 Ereneta returns! (21/8/2002)
• solaris ~10 Ereneta (24/8/2002)
• monkey ~10 Ereneta (24/8/2002)
• Phoenix ~14 koreykruse at last adds and not subtracts from the list! (24/8/2002)
• Steven Wright ~10 1 bio, 9 quotes (26/8/2002)
• The Prisoner ~11 Ereneta (26/8/2002)
• gender neutral pronoun ~15 (27/8/2002)

C! this header

• They Might Be Giants ~13 koreykruse (31/8/2002)
• déjà vu ~10 koreykruse (31/8/2002)
• how to cook rice ~11 RR (7/9/2002)
• Tempest ~11 kk (20/9/2002)
• Things that i've overheard ~10 Frankie (20/9/2002)

koreykruse goes ballistic

• The "My parents suck with computers" node ~13
• There are no good contraceptives ~10
• If you know a religion to be false, should you tell its followers? ~13
• Sometimes ~11
• Ripping off soda machines ~10
• Bible Contradictions ~10
• LSD ~10
• Mountain Dew ~11
• A Clockwork Orange ~10
• moon ~12
• red ~10
• gold ~13 (you've got the power to know you're really votable)
• Scientology ~11
• time ~18 ups
• Mac OS X ~11 writeups
• Chocolate - 10 writeups
• BeOS ~11 writeups
• Exchanging authors ~12
• Marriage ~16 w
• Anthrax ~10
• Chicago ~14
• Civilization ~10
• Cocaine ~15
• Everything 2 Civil War ~16
• Jerusalem ~12
• XP pack rape ~10
• Macbeth ~10
• We CAN walk through walls since we're only 0.01% substance ~11
• feminine hygiene products never cease to amaze ~10
• passionate kiss ~10
• tea ~14
• tree ~10

Only Lone Star gives me raspberry

• cricket ~12 Frankie (24/9/2002)
• core ~10 RR (30/9/2002)
• elf ~11 RR (30/9/2002)
• You couldn't use a time machine to visit the 13th century ~10 caknuck and Ereneta both alerted me 2 this (1/10/2002)
• if ~14 caknuck (3/10/2002)
• you ~10 caknuck (3/10/2002)
• Objectivism ~11 (4/10/2002)
• The End ~13 Thanks Susan and Frankie (10/10/2002)
• hell ~12 Ereneta (18/10/2002)
• "Throw your hands (up) in the air, (and) wave them all around like you (just) don't care" ~10 Throw your votes on that node there, up or down, I just don't care (20/10/2002)
• god is dead ~15 thanks Hexter (21/10/2002)
• Why the college fraternity and sorority system is ridiculous ~ 10 koreykruse (24/10/2002)
• cat ~12 RR (24/10/2002)
• Beowulf ~16 caknuck (24/10/2002)
• Blind faith in Science is just as bad as blind faith in Religion ~ 12 kk (29/10/2002)
• baby ~10 RR (7/11/2002)
• Final Fantasy ~15 cheers amib (7/11/2002)
• choosing a password ~13 RR (10/11/2002)
• ed ~10 RR (10/11/2002)
• War ~19 ta mirv (10/11/2002)
• I felt a disturbance in the fun, as if a million playgrounds cried out, and then ~ 16 amib(11/11/2002)
• Why programmers don't comment their code ~10 caknuck (13/11/2002)
• why I wear black ~11 RR (22/11/2002)

Happy birthday to me happy birthday to me happy birthday what to do if you've got too many votes on your hands even though the node whose title you got the inspiration from has now been nuked happy birthday to me

• Aurora Borealis ~10 Frankie sez, "(until the eds clean it out)" (6/12/2002)
• Epiphany ~ 14 kk (6/12/2002)
• zeno's paradox ~11 AEton (6/12/2002)
• evolution ~15 dg sez, "15 write-ups and isn't locked. i find that remarkable". (6/12/2002)
• smoking ~11 kk (6/12/2002)
• genetically modified food ~ 11 kk (11/12/2002)
• Why can't men buy tampons? ~11 Thanks, mirv. Testosterone pride, Sensitive new age men, Southpark quotes. It doesn't get any better than this. (11/12/2002)
• terrorism ~10 kk (12/12/2002)

(r) 2002.12.11@21:55 mirv says re What to do if you've got too many votes on your hands : behold, o Footprints, for the sight of this pile o' bloated nodes shall be pleasing to thine eyes

• programming as art ~12
• Summit in Savannah~10
• A-team ~11 I pity the fool who don't vote on this node;

elemental nodes

• water ~12
• air ~13
• fire ~14

• song ~14
• catting weird things to /dev/audio ~11
• how to talk to tech support ~11

• bridge ~10
• Dragon ~10
• Esperanto ~10

• chemistry jokes ~11
• Attention Deficit Disorder ~10 (refrain from obvious jokes on the last one)
• The USA is not a democracy ~11
• I Want You ~11

/mirv

• death ~22 kk updates, and mirv adds: hey hey, kids! death to oversized nodes filled with cut-and-paste jobs (twenty writeups, about half of them original). (16/12/2002)
• karma ~18 AEton says: "and it's still open, too!" (16/12/2002)
• Stigmata ~11 RR (16/12/2002)
• caffeine ~12 AEton (16/12/2002)
• float ~10 AEton (21/12/2002)
• electoral college ~17 AEton (21/12/2002)
• Songs that are blatantly stolen from other songs ~11 AEton (21/12/2002)
• ghost ~13 caknuck (21/12/2002)
• love ~11 AEton (22/12/2002)
• hurricane ~12 (22/12/2002)
• The Sims ~12 AEton says, "And still open" (27/12/2002)
• trust ~12 AEton (27/12/2002)
• Why You Should Tip Waitresses ~10 AEton (27/12/2002)
• flag burning amendment ~10 AEton (27/12/2002)
• pi ~19 AEton says, "No more writeups are being accepted for this node. The node is longer than the damn number." (27/12/2002)
• bitch ~10 AEton (27/12/2002)
• jane ~10 AEton (27/12/2002)
• ... ~12 AEton says, "And STILL OPEN" (27/12/2002)

AEton

• children ~10 AEton says, "but try not to softlink it, because that's bad softlinking as commentary." (28/12/2002)
• pornography ~11 "better softlink fodder"(28/12/2002)
• gravity ~15 (28/12/2002)
• shadows ~10 (28/12/2002)
• alive ~10 (29/12/2002)
• one ~12 (29/12/2002)
• seven ~11 (29/12/2002)
• prime ~10 (29/12/2002)
• angel ~11 (29/12/2002)
• heaven ~12 (29/12/2002)

/AEton

• Those who are the most intelligent are often the most likely to go insane ~10 RR (29/12/2002)

AEton again (we apologize for the interruption)

• winter ~11 (1/1/2003) (Footprints pledges to keep you voting in the new year)
• spring ~13 AEton says: "(summer is 6, autumn 6, and fall 4). damn synonyms ruining our fun (1/1/2003)
• A short writing game ~13 "it's one of those intentional-multiple-w/u-nodes, and it's still open! wow!" (1/1/2003)
• cancer ~10 "but nothing substantial on the plague which will one day kill us all" (1/1/2003)
• aquarius ~11 (1/1/2003)
• 2001: A Space Odyssey ~10 (1/1/2003)
• numbers ~10 (15/01/2003)
• die ~10 (15/01/2003)
• sleep ~10 (15/01/2003)
• nigger ~13 (*wince*) (15/01/2003)
• How to write an "A" paper with minimal effort ~11 (15/01/2003)
• raven ~11 (15/01/2003) 15/01/2003)
• [the moon ~15 still open(15/01/2003)
• the man ~12 (you'd think there'd be just one)(15/01/2003)
• What would happen if an immovable object were confronted with an unstoppable force? ~11 (15/01/2003)

/AEton

• Fermat's Last Theorem ~10 mirv(15/01/2003)
• Movies where people do 31337 h4x0ring on a Macintosh PowerBook ~10 mirv (15/01/2003)

Just before the war (possibly the last update, if a chemical scud lands next to my house)

• Attack of the Clones ~14 mirv (11/2/2003)
• focus ~10 AEton (11/2/2003)
• chopsticks ~11 mirv (11/2/2003)
• art ~14 AEton (11/2/2003)
• lucky strike ~11 mirv says: "most of them suck" (11/2/2003)
• blade runner ~10 AEton (11/2/2003)
• chaos ~15 AEton (11/2/2003)
• K ~10 AEton (11/2/2003)
• HOT DAMN 2! When Ohio's a rockin' don't come a knockin' ~11 RimRod (11/2/2003)
• When am I an adult? ~13 mirv (11/2/2003)
• Catch-22 ~10 AEton (11/2/2003)
• The Art of the Mix Tape ~10 AEton (11/2/2003)
• lilith ~13 AEton (11/2/2003)
• How to fight and not get your ass kicked ~13 AEton (11/2/2003)
• Superman ~11 kk (11/2/2003)
• mirv says: "Rain overflows with 20 writeups" (11/2/2003)

So this duck walks into a duck

• AEton says words that can be written on a calculator ~11. meep (5/3/2002)
• mirv says Computers as characters in Sci-Fi ~15 (5/3/2002)
• Frankie says What the hell is Grimace, anyway? ~11 (5/3/2002)
• mirv says I reserve the right to club you and eat your bones (great title, eh?) ~10 (5/3/2002)
• They Might Be Giants ~13 /dev/joe, inexplicably, has 2 writeups here, so you can downvote him twice! (5/3/2002)
• AEton says kid a: ~14 (27/3/2003)
• AEton says calculus: ~11 (27/3/2003)
• AEton says prayer: ~10 (27/3/2003)
• AEton says nutella: ~10 (27/3/2003)
• AEton says free will: ~12 (27/3/2003)
• AEton says minimum wage: ~10 (27/3/2003)
• AEton says tron: ~11 (27/3/2003)
• AEton says How to build a hijack-proof airplane: ~10 (9/4/2003)
• AEton says everything: ~12 (9/4/2003)
• AEton says the greatest economic system ever: ~12, it starts with a nice troll and things degenerate from there. ay! (9/4/2003)
• AEton says vegetarian: ~10 (9/4/2003)
• mirv says Halloween has 16. (9/4/2003)
• Catchpole says "a nice addition, particulary Wharfinger's effort: Where were you when the Space Shuttle Challenger exploded? - 12w-u's" (9/4/2003)
• AEton says ecstasy: ~13 (9/4/2003)

Didn't know I was looking for love

• AEton says fire and ice ~10 (19/6/2003)
• Frankie says Death Penalty - 18 (19/6/2003)
• AEton says entropy: ~13 (19/6/2003)
• mirv says another one for The List: Problem of Evil, 17 writeups. (19/6/2003)
• AEton says ramen: ~15! Tell me about your secret ramen recipes (19/6/2003)
• AEton says How to find out your own IP address: ~10 (although with the firmlink to ipfrom, lord alone knows how long that'll last) (19/6/2003)
• AEton says alpha: ~11 (19/6/2003)
• AEton says delta: ~10 (19/6/2003)
• AEton says omega: ~13 (19/6/2003)
• AEton says Harry Potter: ~12 (5/8/2003)
• AEton says hero: ~10 (5/8/2003)
• AEton says class: ~11 (5/8/2003)
• AEton says flat: ~12 (5/8/2003)
• AEton says Good practical jokes: ~10 (5/8/2003)
• AEton says Asperger's Syndrome: ~10 (5/8/2003)
• RimRod says smile -- 11 (5/8/2003)
• avjewe says Rock, paper, scissors has 16 wu's (5/8/2003)

Since my last update, E2 and Saddam have a new home

• AEton says straight edge: ~12 (15/12/2003)
• RimRod says Giving our kids something to rebel against -- 10 (15/12/2003)
• AEton says spike: ~12 (15/12/2003)
• RimRod says Gimp is not superior to Photoshop -- 11 (15/12/2003)
• AEton says ILOVEYOU: ~11 (15/12/2003)
• Matt_t_hat says sin 11 WU + Webster 1913. (15/12/2003)
• mirv says for The List: Prosenoder's Cup 2003, with *48* writeups. (15/12/2003)

I'm fixing a hole where the rain gets in

• RimRod says Japanese ~10 (22/2/2004)
• AEton says It's gonna be a Happy New Year: long distance plane flight: ~14 (22/2/2004)
• City of Souls I ~14 It's been a long long long time since I found one (4/4/2004)
• RimRod says euro -- 10 (4/4/2004)
• Gone in Sixty Seconds - Theatre Quest Entries ~18 18! (25/4/2004)

1st update of the 4 year bonanza right on the day

• telbij says: point -- 10 (6/12/2004)
• telbij says: Oo, I found another one with 10: Egyptian rat screw ~10 (10/12/2004)
• 2005.1.15 Glowing Fish says I've just found the perfect thing to do when you have too many votes on your hand. You just have to type "religion" and "girlfriend" in the search box, and systematically downvote everything you see
• RimRod says Visual Basic - 12 (15/1/2005)
• TheBooBooKitty says pop has 10 writeups (20/2/2005)
• telbij says The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy ~11 (22/5/2005)
• Gone in Sixty Seconds 2005 - Theatre Quest Entries ~29 (28/5/2005)
• telbij says Lucid dream ~11 (16/6/2005)
• jrn says BDSM is the sign of a sick society - 10, with the occasional good one hiding there. (16/6/2005)
• JohnnyGoodyear says Cricket's got 15. (11/8/2005)

First and foremost, remember that you have as many votes as you want.
Second and, uh, secondmost, remember to never node about noding.

What NOT to do

• Do not vote dump. Read each writeup before you vote on it. Vote according to the individual writeup's merit. Be a contributing member of E2 with your votes - not a leech.
• Under no circumstances should you become a serial downvoter (even if the noder "deserves it"). This is bad karma. If everything by a particular noder is really that bad, bring it to the attention of an editor.
• Do not upvote everything you read. Serial upvoting is (almost) just as bad as serial downvoting.
• Don't be an XP Whore. If you are voting simply to earn XP, then you have missed the point. Writers should node for the ages. Voters should vote for the ages.

Upvote

Let's face it - most of us wouldn't be here if there wasn't something good to read. I promise you, you will find some excellent, funny, witty, interesting, and thought-provoking writeups. Upvote them. Ching them. Send the author some loving messages. Get to know the good authors you find. Read some more of their work. Check out their homenodes. Bounce ideas off of them. Everything is a community.

Downvote

I can guarantee that you will also come across a lot of crap here. Some people who like E2 just don't end up being good writers. Newbies make mistakes, and no offense to the long time users (including those who have been here since day one), but a lot of those old writeups just haven't stood the test of time. There is no bullshit to be earned. The bar has been raised.

So, what do you do when you find something unworthy of E2? Don't be afraid to downvote. Downvoting is your way of letting the writer and the Content Editors know that you don't like the writeup*. Perhaps yours will be the only downvote. Do not be ashamed or embarrassed about expressing your opinion. It's just a number in a database after all. However, you should provide your criticism (preferably of the constructive variety) to the author in the form of a /msg. Submit a Nuke Request if you think it's needed. If you are able, create a better writeup to replace it. This place needs more actual content. Let's begin.

* Do not confuse dislike with disagree. A well thought out and intelligently written writeup should be rewarded with an upvote even if you don't agree with the opinions or point of view of the author.

Now for what you came here for: The voting ideas.

Start at node_id #1

I have started a project to generate statistics for all of the nodes on E2. This may be very helpful for you in choosing writeups to vote on. For example, the reports list things such as:

• Writeups with the most upvotes/downvotes
• Writeups with the highest/lowest reputation
• Users with the highest/lowest XP
• Nodes with the most writeups
• Nodes with the longest/shortest titles
• etc.

The concept behind these voting ideas is similar to some of the ideas listed below, except that I have already done the work for you. This project is run by starting at node_id #1 and working my way up gathering statistics on each node and voting on every writeup found. You can see my progress by visiting the nodes below:

• NOTE: the first 10000 nodes contain no writeups, so no report was generated for them
• The First 20000 Nodes
• The First 30000 Nodes
• The First 40000 Nodes
• The First 50000 Nodes
• The First 60000 Nodes - coming soon to a node near you!

Node Audits

Get your name listed in the node audit writeup, or just offer the service on your homenode. You will have authors begging you to vote on their writeups. Of course you will have to take the time to help the noder and offer some comments, but you should be doing that anyway, shouldn't you?

If no one asks you for a node audit, do it anyway...

...Pick a User, Any User

Users with lots of writeups

There are generally two places to find users with lots of writeups: Everything's Best Users or the top of the Other Users Nodelet. One reason you might want to pick a user with lots of writeups is so that you have a long term project. After all, you came to this node because you have too many votes on your hands. An M-noder will keep you busy for weeks or months.

Users with few writeups

Again, there are generally two places to find users with a few w