Everything2
Near Matches
Ignore Exact
Full Text
Everything2

This is just pure cool! It's cryptic, mystical, lovely. I had no choice!

created by wharfinger

(idea) by Mike1024 (2.7 y) (print)   ?   1 C! I like it! Tue Dec 12 2000 at 21:40:27

A long time, I had been looking for a good present. It had taken far longer than I expected; I thought I could just walk through town, and see something to buy her. I thought the same last year, but it didn't work then either; she seems to have everything.

It wasn't until I was on my way home that I thought of it. Wandering past a nearby missile silo, I remembered the everything2 node on suitcase-sized nuclear demolitions devices. I wandered in, doing a quick SAS five-second knockout on the first guard I saw. I picked up his M4A1 rifle, then I punched, kicked and shot my way into the nuclear weapons storage room, and grabbed myself a suitcase. Fortunately, I knew how to blow up a building with a sack of flour and two rounds of ammunition, which I was lucky enough to have with me at the time. This I did, then I left the area quickly.

Anyway, I got it home and opened it. It was basically a flashy briefcase, with lots of electronics inside, when you open it. I painted over all the buttons, and used a permanant silver marker pen to draw 'warhammer' runes on the buttons, and popped in some dry ice for effect. I did up the clasp, wrapped it, and put a little bow on top, and put it under the tree.

Then came Christmas Day. She came down the stairs behind me, and we dived into the pile of presents. Wrapping paper flew everywhere, until she came to it. She tore the paper back, and pulled out the case, then opened it.

'Wow' she said. 'This is just pure cool! It's cryptic, mystical, lovely.'

'I had no choice!' I replied. 'I saw it, and I thought of you. I love you.'

'I love you too.'

Those four words make it all worthwile.

It doesn't make much sense, but that's because it's a rescued nodeshell.


printable version
chaos

Blow up a building with a sack of flour and two rounds of ammunition Is forbidden the camping and the nakedness The SAS five second knockout Suitcase-sized nuclear demolitions devices
If this were in person, I would have kissed her now Ginny successfully changes the subject Nodeshell as a term has got to go She is stupidly keeping herself a secret, when I know she has sparkly things to show me
Warning to tree cutters How many geniuses have we lost this way? The Cook, The Thief, His Wife and Her Lover Men have feelings too
The old abandoned Internet, off on the edge of town Do Her Her, eating apples Daily Evil - Monday, October 2nd, 2000
Poughkeepsie, New York M41A Pulse Rifle Khârn the Betrayer Tikus
Now I know why I get the urge to kill her Lady Lovelylocks Sepher Yezirah, A Book on Creation James Bond
Y'know, if you log in, you can write something here, or contact authors directly on the site. Create a New User if you don't already have an account.
  Epicenter
Login
Password

password reminder
register

Everything2 Help


cooled by sgtbaker

Cool Staff Picks
Little presents from the Node Fairy:
It's not my fault that I'm so evil
Incubus
Sally
free lunch
Convolvulaceae
I am forced to smoke my cat
fertility awareness
Friedrich Nietzsche
coelacanth
Technological advances take up more of our time
The Idiot's Guide to the Transmutation of Morals
flea
Eminent Domain disaster: Sunset Hills (St. Louis), Missouri
New Writeups
Dark_lord
Dejap(person)
FrankThomas
How and why do we (humans) have culture?(essay)
lee_cad
Isaac(person)
kalen
downvota(poetry)
Andrew Aguecheek
Wstfgl(thing)
ncc05
overheard at IHOP(event)
calgon
Bottomless(poetry)
lismaraxt
Ice Theory of The Origin of Life(idea)
allthetime
Apple Cinnamon Suicide(idea)
Lucy-S
shovelglove(idea)
Adaptive Child
Mexican secret sauce(recipe)
Adaptive Child
nacho libre(recipe)
TheLady
Iron Man(review)
Scaevola
Risk in the Roman law of sale(idea)
semicolon
overheard at IHOP(event)
E2 is a by-product of the existence of The Everything Development Company