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The Meaning of Sandwich

created by Forest-Kodama

(idea) by Forest-Kodama (3.5 y) (print)   ?   (I like it!) Sat Jan 29 2005 at 4:57:28

Here lies a conundrum worthy of contemplation. Only imagine three pieces of bread stacked atop one another in the classic sandwich formation. The dilemma becomes apparent in referring to this as "a sandwich." Is it possible to make a bread sandwich? Is it two sandwiches? In fact, there could be as many as three sandwiches in this seemingly simple stronghold of snacking. But, much like the highlander of old, for this definition there can be only one.

Technically speaking of course this is a sandwich; after all sandwich is a verb defining the act of jamming something between two others. The middle piece of bread is, then, sandwiched between the other two, and essentially a bread sandwich is born.

However, there are also two different sandwich formations within the whole: two on top and two on bottom (both sharing the middle slice). Would this sandwich be two sandwiches in one, or would it combine with the regular bread sandwich already described to be three sandwiches? Is it possible for a sandwich to be more than one sandwich at one time? Some sort of cosmic alignment would very likely be created in this multiwich scenario, and I've seen no such event in light of the creation of this sandwich. There's no word for a dual sandwich article in any language I'm aware of, but in the case of the three-bread-predicament, perhaps a new set of prefixes and modifications for sandwich are in order. Here we have the biwich (shared middle), or even the triwich (shared middle, and one large sandwich). If these are true, then we could assume such items as the infiniwich (which would actually have infinity +1 sandwiches) to see the light of possibility. The implications of this could take this entire node, or become its own if one follows the reasoning of other in-depth experiments.

Can it be so simple though? I'm sure anyone trying to stretch the gray matter about this terrifying cullinary item should say not. Nowadays, sandwiches are referred to as slices of bread with filling between or on top. Unless you've at last found canned bread, or bread flavored jelly, then a bread sandwich is impossible. Based on the fact that I have seen no infinite sandwich power generators, and the lack of any linguistic term for the multiwich, my conclusion is that three pieces of bread stacked on top of each other are just that; multiple sandwiches occupying the same space at the same time would create a rift in the delicate sandwich continuum, bringing wheaty, balanced nutritional doom down upon all processed meat carnivores and condoment grazers in the vicinity.


printable version
chaos

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