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So, who is this Webster 1913 guy, anyway?

created by haggai

(person) by haggai (5 mon) (print)   ?   4 C!s I like it! Sat Apr 08 2000 at 21:40:06

For one of the most popular noders on Everything, we actually know very little about the secretive Mr. Webster 1913. His writeups are all somehow very impersonal (albeit informative). He has never posted on any "getting to know you" nodes. For instance, I'd be interested to see his explanation on How did you choose your Everything username? At a guess, he found that plain "Webster" was already taken, and following the usual advice of adding a number he added 1913: either his birth year (for an oldtimer he's pretty with-it to be posting on Everything), or his favourite year in European politics. Or is it "the Webster", a name showing his cool mastery of all things web-related? He speaks a kind of stilted, old fashioned, bookish American English, but he's always very careful to be precise with words.

His nodes do, admittedly, express a certain wry humour. Consider his gentle jibe on the topic of browsers, or his witty summaries on Bandrol, Hylozoic, and Struvite (really a borderline post for friend Webby). Occasionally he posts dumb stuff just for the extra XP (like Tant or Stratagetic), which totally sucks -- come on, Webster, you have all the experience you need, anyway! At least he doesn't post porn and swearwords!

There's an entry he himself wrote, titled Webster, but what to make of his self-deprecating humour? Is W. 1913 a female weaver, or -- excuse me? -- bratbait? So you try out his home node. Whoa! Our friend the Webster hasn't been on since December. Is he ill, or bored of Everything, or what? Or has he simply exhausted his encyclopedic erudition and gone elsewhere? He has almost 100,000 writeups, but since the management blocked our ability to vote for him, he only has like 1000 XP more than writeups! Instead of a Bio he gives you some nonsense legalese, and leaves his private life a mystery by leaving the other fields blank.

I'd like to take the liberty at least of filling in these blanks.
mission drive within everything: loquaciously define trivia, to ascend to the utmost stature in Everything, that I may scoff superciliously at others, once I am the ubiquitous noder spewed out by the Random Node.
specialties: dated American English
school/company: Project Gutenberg and the Sesquipedelian Society
motto: definition by Webster 1913

Mot"to (?), n.; pl. Mottoes (#). {It. motto a word, a saying, L. muttum a mutter, a grunt, cf. muttire, mutire, to mutter, mumble; prob. of imitative origin. Cf. Mot a word.}

1. Her.

A sentence, phrase, or word, forming part of an heraldic achievment.

2.

A sentence, phrase, or word, prefixed to an essay, discourse, chapter, canto, or the like, suggestive of its subject matter; a short, suggestive expression of a guiding principle; a maxim.

It was the motto of a bishop eminent for his piety and good works, ... "Serve God, and be cheerful." Addison.


(idea) by Attache (4 y) (print)   ?   1 C! I like it! Wed Jul 26 2000 at 3:26:19

We all know what he looks like but, the mysteries surrounding the true identity of this so called 'Webster_1913' abound. One popular 'urban legend' recants the tale of Webster_1913's beginnings.

"Some say he once lived in northern Ohio until a beautiful girl trod on his heart and sent him bumping across the world in search of a way to fill that empty space where his heart used to be. They say that thats how he learned so much. He just replaced the spot in his life that used to be love with the mad gathering of knowledge that has since obsessed his life."

-Gary Busey from his book "Some people are good, some are bad"

Rumors abound about those days on the road. One tall tale tells of his involvement in a 'secret' war with Mexico. One other famous speculation places him as a branch on the same family tree as Eli Whitney, however there is still no proof as to the truth these ridiculous trivialities. This is not to say that he didn't have his real problems, whether they were in the courts of china or in the world's largest underground network of caves (We all know what happened that fate encrusted new years eve). Whatever the case, Webster_1913 has finally dropped out of the public eye, and into our hearts.

No one knows how old he was when he decided to stop traveling. One day he just up and left the road behind, with a whole lot of memories and quite a few more ideas. That's how we came to know him. The lover; The fighter; The node writer... Webster_1913.


printable version
chaos

Webster browser Pretending to be Webster 1913 to score at parties Everything women respond to Webster 1913
Struvite Noah Webster Bandrol Tant
For Webster 1913, whenever I may find him Hylozoic Sesquipedelian Society Keeping beer cold in the Old West
How did the matrix know what blue looked like? Double-tonguing Webster 1913 is a fake XP
In the defense of nice Management Random Node Project Gutenberg
Corporate Whore loquacious porn legalese
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