Scheisse! The Real German You Were Never Taught in School

Have you ever wanted to say, "My great stallion," to the man of your dreams, in German? Softly whisper, "Mein toller Hengst." Ever wondered how to say "Take a hike!" to that cocky German exchange student who drinks all of your beer? Just holler, "Mach'ne Fliege!"

The book, "Scheisse! The Real German You Were Never Taught in School", by Gertrude Besserwisser, can teach you all of the things you have been dying to say in German, but would never have learned from Frau Schmidt's German class. (Or whatever your German teacher's name was.) This book covers a wide variety of German slang, explaining the origin, background, and literal translation, of common and regional slang.

Some of my favorate translations from this book include:

• Mir geht es ziemlich beschissen heute. -- I'm feeling pretty shitty today.
• Der hat nicht alle Tassen im Schrank! -- He's missing a few marbles! (literally, He doesn't have all his cups in his cabinet)
• die Schlampe -- Slut.
• Dir hat man wohl ins Gehirn geschissen und vergessen umzuruhren. -- Are you totally out of your mind? (actually: Someone must have shit into your brain and forgotten to stir it)
• Du toller Hecht. -- You devil of a man. (literally, You mad pike -- Note: I was later corrected that toll can mean "mad" but in this case it means great/super. Thanks linda!)
• Denkst du, ich bin ein Dukatenkacker? -- Do you think I shit money?
• Ich kann nicht anders, ich vergöttere dich vollkommen -- I can't help myself. I adore you like a goddess.