Note: This writeup is half-joking. While I am a C bigot, this is intended with a humorous tone.
This is my beloved nodeshell. I am filling it upon challenge (or, in his words, "demand") from kaatunut, who is no doubt a crazy, hemp-smoking, communist perl weenie. Please hear me out before downvoting.
Now, I am a C coder. I feel low level, application programming is the One True Path. But these days more and more, there are all sorts of hippies trying to spread propaganda that languages other than C exist. They think perl is cool. These are pure lies.
And then there are the web developer weenies, who are the worst of the hippies, living a lie. The lie that HTTP is dynamic. Coding in their trendy unreadable perl CGI, and all the while I am coding a rich online application with BSD sockets. Yes, you can code sockets in perl and the like, but is it nearly as fast or flexible as mine? And I can do all sorts of low-level niceness that you can't.
Of course, we all experiment with those things in our youth. I looked at these hippie languages, and started out coding in one. Then I went to rehab, learned C and became clean. Then I again explored these weenie languages, only to say, "this sucks because it is not C".
There is only one way to do it, and that is in C.
Learn C, you hippies! | 
