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How to win the gold and prevent a baby from crying
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Thu Oct 19 2000 at 15:04:59
In
how to win the gold and make a baby cry.
I warned of the dangers of playing
Gran Turismo 2
while babysitting. Unless you like to inflict yourself with pain I suggest you not do that.
A couple of days later my friend and I were playing the game once again. We wanted the
Honda Spoon
. Two more license tests to go and it would be ours.
Tests B-9 and B-10, maneuvering a S-turn with a
Ford Cougar
. Once again we were presented with difficulty (i.e. see
how to win the gold and make a baby cry.
), once again we became frustrated, and once again we became intense.
Once again the baby was in her
stationary shock absorber
bouncing away and drooling to the rhythm of the music to the game.
We won B-9. We came close on B-10. We needed to get through the turn in 20.300 seconds. We had gotten 20.415 and 20.393, but the real slap to the head came when we earned 20.304. Do you know how small of a difference that is? Four thousandths of a second! An hour went by. Then another.
We're so close. Darn it!
20.304! Awww! Com'on!
Whoa! Watch out for the first turn.
ahhhaaahh...hummm...pbbbttt!
What? Aw, man! My thumbs. My thumbs!
This
Honda Spoon
better not be like an
wiener truck
or something
Almost one hour and fifteen minutes since we began my friend finished the race. 19.992 seconds. Not only did we win, we broke 20 seconds.
We came. We saw. We conquered. We screamed.
YES!
I looked at my friend. He looked at me. We looked at the baby. She looked like she was going to cry.
He picked her up and threw her in the air. (You know the way only fathers can do). He kissed her and played with her making it think we were excited because of her.
I joined in with baby-voiced shouts and yelps. I felt like such a fool.
She didn't cry.
It was worth it.
The
Honda Spoon
wasn't.
We went on and accepted our prize of the
Honda Spoon
.
What a piece of junk
. Well, not really. It has a good top speed, but
it corners like a cockroach through malto meal
. Bottom line. We sold it.
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