How much money do you make?

This is one of the most asinine questions you can ask another man (if you're a man). I'm not sure how this works with women, but I suppose it's about the same.

If someone asks you this, the obvious answer is, "More than you, obviously." But you must just quietly say to yourself, "Purse my lips," and try to be tactful in the face of this abject rudeness.

I had a good friend whom I've know for several years ask me this last year, and I have not really cared to see him since. It changed everything between us, and we've said stuff to each other that would curl youngsters' ears to the point of deafness for life. This, however, was inexcusable. I could tell he wished he hadn't said it, and I actually told him, which I wished I hadn't done.

I had a another friend who was a go-getter and wound up in the advertising business (see Johnny and Mary if you want to know more about what that will do to you). He said that you should be earning your age. For instance, if you're 30, you should be earning at least $30,000 a year. That was back in the early 1980's. I wonder what the benchmark for young working folks is now?

A sneaky way of politely asking how much someone makes is to ask "how much does a typical ______ make?" (insert name of job/profession of person you are asking).

It isn't a direct question (there's no "you" in there), so the usual defensive mechanisms are not primed for it and the beauty is that most people wouldn't know exactly how much other people like them are making so they can only talk from experience - personal experience.

Even if someone does ask me "what does a typical network administrator make?", I always say I'm not typical. Perhaps my vocation is unusual, but it is not very difficult to know the market averages, by region, so I tell them the norms for Atlanta by experience, and explain that ability and salesmanship can vault an individual well past the norm.