I'm not making this up. I have some of this self-styled "
redemption on a stick."
Friend gave it to me. The friendly packaging proclaims:
Handy salvation for the sinner on the go!
"Monk's special reserve"
ANOINTMENT OINTMENT
Cheap red wine flavor
For liars, cheaters & wrong-doers
Moisturizes as it sooths GUILTY conscience
Directions for use:
- Engage stick
- Bow head
- Reflect upon wrong-doing
- Anoint thy lips with blessed balm
- Rub lips together to boost powerful sin-purging action
- Raise head and go forth cleansed from sin and ready to do-it-again
WARNING: Re-apply balm frequently especially during prolonged
sin exposure